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Re: bizarre meeting(s) mswgradstudent

Posted by ElaineM on July 26, 2006, at 19:50:07

In reply to Re: bizarre meeting(s), posted by mswgradstudent on July 26, 2006, at 15:06:12

Gradstudent: Nice to meet you. Though I'm sorry that you can identify -- it is so hard to give up things you've been fantasizing about, and blowing up in your head since you were a little girl. At least for me.

Even in my teens I used to cry on my bed wishing that a man could even just accept me as a role-filler. He didn't even have to love me. Just let me take care of him, and him be around, and then be a good and loving father to a baby. I always knew that I could give up the idea of being loved myself. But I've lost even that wish now. No one could stand me no matter how well I cook or clean or take care of a home -- h*ll, i can't even do half of that stuff anymore now. (Sorry, I know that my responses seem very 1950's. This is only what is important to me. I never believed I was smart enough to have a career. I'm not an anti-feminist at all)

Are you going to be a T? I think it's interesting to hear different perspectives. I think what you said about needing to remember that T's are regular people too underneath their therapist cloaks, is very true. It must be hard to recognize when to hold back certain parts of yourself.

It sounds like you are having a hard time yourself. When everyone goes to sleep, sneak out to eat -- it's important. Thanks for your concern. I can't make promises, but I'm trying to cope the best I can.

Take care of yourself too.




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