Posted by DaisyM on February 17, 2004, at 23:08:45
In reply to Our little girls, posted by antigua on February 17, 2004, at 16:49:49
>>>But what I'm struck by (yes, yes I'm getting to the point!!) is that my T concentrates on helping me find the strength to deal w/what is going on--and not leaning on her. I don't know if this is because she knows I don't ever trust anyone anyway, or what, but I don't have that wonderful sense that so many of you do that you can lean on your T. I can count on her, but it's all up to me. Maybe it's because I won't lean on her? It's too scary, though, I don't know how you guys do it. I admire you all so much.
<<<<Antigua, I think different methods work for different people (Ok, yes, Captain Obvious has spoken.)I know that ultimately it will be up to me to integrate all this stuff. I think trusting and leaning on a Therapist can be helpful but I agree that it is very scary. I alternate between borrowing my Therapist's strength and hope and pushing him away and trying to rely again only on myself. I think this is why he was upset to be left out of the pool. I told him I thought it was a "rule" that I had to do the work myself. He asked whose rule, and I realized that I had made that assumption -- that it was the only way to get through all of this.So sometimes trusting is the only way I can hang on. And other times I realize how much I'm leaning and I yank myself back. Old habits for us, is my guess. But I think you are under estimating how much you have learned to lean on your Therapist. You do trust her to follow her advice and you risk talking about really hard subjects with her. So, see how brave you are??
poster:DaisyM
thread:314418
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040211/msgs/314955.html