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Re: Too close to home

Posted by Willow on August 15, 2001, at 16:41:09

In reply to Too close to home, posted by JennyR on August 14, 2001, at 19:26:06

> I stay because of the kids, and because I don't want to hurt husband. The result is I'm miserable. There's not the slightest doubt in my mind that if this were a boyfriend, I'd be outta there in a flash. What I was willing to settle for then, and what I feel I deserve now are very different.
The other question it brings up for me is, does the lousy marriage which meets none of my needs cause the depression, of does the depression make me dissatisfied with the marriage? No way to tell.

I just changed a few words and I'm in the same boat Jenny. I do love my husband, but besides looking after our home and a physical relationship there's nothing else here for me. He's supportive and helpful, plus he does have his bad points. He's miserable/grouchy when he wakes up, plus he doesn't do anything with the children besides feed, etc. Plus he has little interest in social activities unless there is alcohol involved.

For myself I think the depression has made the relationship worse, making me more dependent thus I'm more able to see his faults. If I was busy about my own business I would be happier thus less likely to be seeking blame.

Just some of my many opinions.

Willow

ps been together 16 years maybe it's what comes after the 7 year itch in less than perfect relationships


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