Psycho-Babble Medication Thread 911201

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Re: a sign

Posted by uncouth on August 11, 2009, at 22:13:23

In reply to Re: a sign, posted by SLS on August 11, 2009, at 20:42:11

Maxime,

I know the feeling like it's a sign. You and I are in similar states right now. Feel free to babblemail.

Yesterday, as if this terrible, suicidal cloud which came over me last week wasn't bad enough, I saw the girl who broke my heart driving on the street. She doesn't even live in town anymore, was just home visiting. OF all things that could have happened to me at that point in time, seeing her was probably the one worst possble thing. It was like God was playing a joke on me, and my suicide was going to be the punchline.

Stay strong, if only for me. I need you to not give up.

Just got back from my pdoc and therapy appointments. On a new drug I hadn't heard of before, Aplenzin, a new form of wellbutin. Doctor wants to try higher than normal doses evntually.

Like scott said, there is always logical hope. Stay away from superstition though it's so easy to be tempted.

 

Re: a sign Maxime

Posted by Phillipa on August 11, 2009, at 23:14:10

In reply to a sign, posted by Maxime on August 11, 2009, at 18:26:20

Maxie talk about a sign this evening I helped deliver my granddaughter in the hospital. Baby Grace named after my Mother who dies when I was l7 was born at 6:38 and weighed 7 lb 2 oz. I was next to the doc and watched her crown and pop out all pink and crying and glad to be alive. So to me this is something would have never wittnessed if I Hadn't been here. And I thought I always brought bad luck? So my point is you don't know what's around the corner could be good. Write anytime. I have pics going on facebook. I never would have believed I could assist in L & D. I surprised myself. You will also you will get well. Love Phillipa

 

Re: a sign

Posted by ceres on August 15, 2009, at 6:56:23

In reply to a sign, posted by Maxime on August 11, 2009, at 18:26:20

Maxime, Can you kill the pills, exert yourself stomping on them & then flush the remains?

I'm in that sad place too, desiring an end & don't have any sincere thoughts about hope now. In your case, having gotten so far in school & perhaps having dependents, I hope you decide to make it through each day & that a positive change is ahead.

Pills are not a good option. Long ago, I vomited an overdose & felt sick & defeated. I figured out how that failed, but would not opt for pills again. I have vague memories of reading Madame Bovary & her toxic brew suicide is some aversion.
If somehow, one were discovered & rushed to the ER, there's no guarantee about the state of one's organs or possible brain damage. Plus there's more trauma, as EMT's & ER doctors are not often nice to people who've caused their own bodily destruction.

And I remind myself that it's too much long-term trauma for my family & friends and anyone who will make the discovery.
Plus, if we commit suicide, it lowers the threshold for suicides within our families. In my case, someone beat me to it & another such might push a vulnerable member over the edge.

And, despite the above rants, I spend a lot of time changing & refining plans, trying to find a lower impact death.
Maybe thinking of a better way to go might relieve your mind a bit, but you can put off acting on it?


I hope you keep going & that the pain eases.

 

Re: a sign ceres

Posted by Maxime on August 15, 2009, at 12:44:43

In reply to Re: a sign, posted by ceres on August 15, 2009, at 6:56:23

Thank you for such a thoughtful post. Unfortunately, I cannot destroy the pills. I NEED to have them around me so that I know that I have a way out. Over a year ago I OD'd on Nortriptaline and Thorazine. I ended up in the hospital and went into cardiac arrest. I was on a ventilator for several days. So now I know that that combination will work. Knowledge isn't always a good thing is it.

I'm thinking less about suicide now and thinking more about trying new meds. I am holding on until I see my doctor on the 24th.

Thanks again.

 

Re: Thinking about suicide

Posted by Maxime on August 16, 2009, at 22:11:19

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide, posted by Sigismund on August 10, 2009, at 20:05:46

I really hope I die in my sleep tonight. If I ever fall asleep that is.

I'm not in a good place right now.

 

Re: Thinking about suicide

Posted by ceres on August 17, 2009, at 2:53:05

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide, posted by Maxime on August 16, 2009, at 22:11:19

Maxime,

I'm sorry about the pain you're enduring. And I hope you fall asleep soon, to give you temporary relief.

Your depression is keeping you from seeing how much good is likely ahead.

Maxime, you sound like a smart, competent & productive person. So if the missing ingredient is to fix your mood, that's worth doing.

Would it be useful to ask your doctor for something to temporarily numb you out a bit so you can sleep away some of the day until your new meds kick in? Or use exhausting exercise or labor to block some pain? Could you focus on movies or lie down & close your eyes to books on tape? --Numbing &/or attempts at Distraction

I hope you find moments of peace tonight & that you can safely fall asleep soon.
You are in my thoughts. Ceres

 

Re: Thinking about suicide Maxime

Posted by SLS on August 17, 2009, at 5:53:26

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide, posted by Maxime on August 16, 2009, at 22:11:19

> I really hope I die in my sleep tonight. If I ever fall asleep that is.
>
> I'm not in a good place right now.


It might be a little too early to be certain about your being doomed to be depressed for the rest of your life. Your brain has shown that it can be normalized for an extended period. It is just a matter of time before you find the right treatment to force it to function properly again.

Are there any responsibilities that you can set aside temporarily? If not, then please remember that you are working with a handicap, and don't beat up on yourself unmercifully.

Also, remember that severe depression is timeless. It has no beginning and no end when you are in the midst of it. This sensation of timelessness begins from the very first day. This is one aspect of depression that allows people choose to exit life, even though they haven't been depressed for very long. It feels like forever.

I have some idea as to what it is like to feel hopeless. Do you feel hopeless right now? If not, then what thoughts are fueling the suicidality? Maybe there are no thoughts at all except for the sense of being overwhelmed by everything. Nothing is right. Everything is wrong. The depression itself might be acting as a substrate for a neurobiological suicidal state that would be there regardless of what you are thinking. This usually occurs in tandem with anxiety or anger.

Logically, you still have treatment alternatives that you have not yet explored. I think it is a bit premature to declare yourself as being doomed.

It is difficult to find the right words to comfort someone who is suicidal. There is a fear of saying the wrong thing that might push the depressed person closer to acting. I hope I have not made things worse.

You'll be alright.


- Scott

 

Re: Thinking about suicide ceres

Posted by Maxime on August 17, 2009, at 10:01:47

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide, posted by ceres on August 17, 2009, at 2:53:05

Thank you for your kind words. I have a lot of trouble sleeping which makes everything worse. I've tried a lot of meds for sleep and not much seems to help. I highly doubt that my pdoc would give me a barbituate to sleep which is what I think I need.

I try to do things ... go to the movies etc. Sometimes I spend an hour on the bus to get to the cinema and then once I am there I cannot force myself in to go and see the movie. I get really anxious or something, I don't know.

The strange thing is that I am working on a reseach paper for my PhD application. I am able to force myself to do that. And it's weird that I on the one hand, I am planning to do my PhD, and on the other hand, I am busy writing suicide notes and obituaries. How can the two co-exist?

 

Re: Thinking about suicide SLS

Posted by Maxime on August 17, 2009, at 10:05:40

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide Maxime, posted by SLS on August 17, 2009, at 5:53:26

Scott, thank you for your post. I do feel hopeless. I think that is what I feel the most. I know that meds have helped temporarily in the past, but I am so tired of things working briefly and then stopping. And not that much has worked either. I have been suffering since my teens and I am 40 now, so that's a lot of depression.

Also, I have life stressors that are not helping the situation. If I could remove them, I would be doing a bit better.

Feeling hopeless sums it up for me.

 

Re: Thinking about suicide

Posted by uncouth on August 17, 2009, at 10:09:54

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide Maxime, posted by SLS on August 17, 2009, at 5:53:26

Scott I just want to thank you for your posts to this thread again. It seems (unsurprisingly) there are a few of us in this state of torment right now and your understanding words give me at least something to lean on. Push push push...

 

Re: Thinking about suicide

Posted by atypical on August 17, 2009, at 10:45:28

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide ceres, posted by Maxime on August 17, 2009, at 10:01:47

> The strange thing is that I am working on a reseach paper for my PhD application. I am able to force myself to do that. And it's weird that I on the one hand, I am planning to do my PhD, and on the other hand, I am busy writing suicide notes and obituaries. How can the two co-exist?

Oh, please believe me when I tell you I understand completely! I can go to parties and have conversations and go work and be very depressed inside. I think that the stereotype of depression really needs to be changed. It doesn't mean that we are bedridden or sitting on the couch watching TV all day. Many of us are functioning, but not necessarily at a high level. Some of us are indeed functioning at a high level intellectually, which perhaps makes us forget about the depression or something.

 

Re: Thinking about suicide

Posted by mogger on August 17, 2009, at 22:23:42

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide SLS, posted by Maxime on August 17, 2009, at 10:05:40

Maxime,
I have been off and on psychobabble for years and have always admired your strength and courage for fighting on. I thought I would mention to you that one of the additions to my cocktail is 10 grams of EPA fish oil. It is actually 20 grams of fish oil a day half of which is EPA. It is 20 capsules a day so it is literally like a meal in itself but it has created a nice sense of well being for me. I buy from iherb, Omeg 3 Mood, by CountryLife. They price match if you can find anywhere cheaper.
It has helped lift me out of depression as I read a book called the Omeg 3 Connection by Dr. Andrew Stoll and learned about it. Babblemail me and I will send it to you if you would like to read it. Please hang in there, you can do it and something will give you a breather soon.
mogger

 

Re: Thinking about suicide mogger

Posted by Maxime on August 19, 2009, at 17:45:09

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide, posted by mogger on August 17, 2009, at 22:23:42

Thank you for your kind thoughts and suggestions. I have tried fish oil in the past, but I don't think I was taking enough and it didn't work. Worth another try though.

 

Re: Thinking about suicide

Posted by ceres on August 21, 2009, at 1:56:43

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide ceres, posted by Maxime on August 17, 2009, at 10:01:47

Oh, sleep deprivation distorts things.
I used to use it as an antidepressant (stopped working), --so destabilizing. It's worth pressing the issue w/ MD. As important as it is, I don't know why many physicians under treat it. *Sleep meds didn't work for me either until I re-added lithium, which also reduced the urgency I felt about suicide for a while.
Have you experimented w/ light therapy (blue light)for sleep regulation & mood?

I can relate to your changing your mind at the cinema. In my case, I don't want to be stuck in an act-normal zone with crushing depression.
Going to a theater is work. I was thinking of DVD's as an absorbing distraction, or Net Flicks, if you have that. Some libraries have good selections & if you get a handful of DVD's, maybe a few will be watchable.
Do you like photography or other art books (pic's, no text)? Rereading childhood books might be a non-demanding whimsical relief, a vacation for part of the mind. Maybe something like this is a possible counterbalance to your graduate studies.

I admire that you can use higher cognitive skills for your studies during this wretched period.
I know there are different flavors of depression & while some people can keep face & manage the basics of their jobs, I have not been able to this time.
Maybe it depends on which parts of the brain are involved? Maybe your depression is similar to that of writers & artists who manage to create while in the depths of despair. Their skills are intact & they are motivated to continue their work, while desperately wanting relief from a hellish mindscape.

I wish for you some good quality sleep & of course, some substantial relief from that invasive anguish, that plagues so many of us.


 

Re: Thinking about suicide

Posted by Meltingpot on August 21, 2009, at 7:55:21

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide ceres, posted by Maxime on August 17, 2009, at 10:01:47

Hi Maxime,

I guess you know that on this board you are definately not alone with these thoughts. The only thing I seem to be able to do any more is work, study or clean the house which might sound like a lot but I used to do a lot more too.

I was feeling suicidal yesterday and I went for two job interviews, whilst I was telling the interviewers how interesting the job sounded, these suicidal thoughts kept popping into my head. Well I guess I was putting them there, like
another poster said sometimes fantasies of suicide bring some kind of relief.

One of my pen pals (who also suffers from depression) can't understand how I can keep working when I'm having suicidal thoughts but I do because it gives me some source of distration and makes me feel as though I have not entirely fallen off the ride and the medication does help to some degree.


I know that my suicidal thoughts are not really me wanting to die but me wanting to end the way I feel but I guess there is always something left to try. I would have ECT but no psychiatrist will refer me for it and if it came down to it and if I'd heard of really good results with Deep Brain Stimulation then I might consider that too.

I understand why the film "the hours" is called "The hours" because all I can do sometimes is just try and get through each hour until the day is finally over and I experience a sense of relief from that. I never used to feel relieved when the day was over.

I have written to a place that delivers assisted suicide and plan on becoming a member because if I ever decide that I just don't want to go on with this daily battle then I will have somewhere I can go to (hopefully) give myself some sort of relief. I just feel like I want to have suicide as an option.

Sometimes people say to me "well why don't you just go and do it then" as if it was that easy. I'm scared of messing it up and like the other poster says, ending up with brain damage. I can't understand how people can hurl themselves in front of trains or jump off high buildings or slash there wrists because I just couldn't do it, I think I get a lot of anxiety from having the suicidal thoughts but then not being able to act upon them. Maybe I just having got that low or maybe I'm not as depressed and anxious as I think I am.

When I read this post back it all sounds so melodramatic but that is how I feel.

A friend who I met recently said that I seemed like a happy person when I talked about my depression. I can fake happiness for a while but it is a strain.

Sorry to go on, sometimes I just get carried away and your post really struck a chord with me.

If anything at least your post made other people feel a little less alone.

Just to mention also I started experiencing sleep problems at Christmas I couldn't not sleep for three nights. I have found that this clomipramine that I am taking definately helps with my sleep so that might be a possible option for you some time in the future.


Denise

 

Re: Thinking about suicide Meltingpot

Posted by SLS on August 21, 2009, at 8:13:51

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide, posted by Meltingpot on August 21, 2009, at 7:55:21

You sound like you might be a tricyclic responder. Which ones have you tried, and what were the outcomes?

Currently:

Parnate 80mg
nortriptyline 150mg
Lamictal 200mg
Abilify 20mg
lithium 300mg


- Scott

 

Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS

Posted by Meltingpot on August 23, 2009, at 5:31:52

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide Meltingpot, posted by SLS on August 21, 2009, at 8:13:51

Hi Scott,

When I was in my 20s, the first antidepressant I was prescribed was prothiaden (I think it is also known as doxepin) and it worked wonderfully, I couldn't have asked for a better response. You know everything looked and seemed brighter, I felt more relaxed than I had ever felt and was much more motivated.

Then the prothiaden seemed to start pooping out after about 5 years. I was put on seroxat and that worked wonderfully as well.

I think I would have responded to any antidepressant I was given in my 20s but for some reason after hitting 35 I seem to have become resistant to everything.

I did try prothiaden (doxepin) again at the age of 35, at much higher doses and it just caused me a lot of anxiety.

Clomipramine is the second tricyclic I've tried (I'm now 43) and although it seems to be helping a bit, it's not helping nearly enough.

It's strange really when I came off antidepressants at 31 I felt ok for three years. This time round though if I stop antidepressants (even though they don't work that well anyway anymore) I feel absolutely horrible. I feel like I'm in some kind of hell.

I was thinking perhaps if I came off antidepressants for a year, just taking Zyprexa, that somehow my brain will revert back to normal and that the antidepressants will work again.

I really don't know what else to do.


Denise

 

Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS Meltingpot

Posted by SLS on August 23, 2009, at 6:24:53

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS, posted by Meltingpot on August 23, 2009, at 5:31:52

> Hi Scott,
>
> When I was in my 20s, the first antidepressant I was prescribed was prothiaden (I think it is also known as doxepin) and it worked wonderfully, I couldn't have asked for a better response. You know everything looked and seemed brighter, I felt more relaxed than I had ever felt and was much more motivated.
>
> Then the prothiaden seemed to start pooping out after about 5 years. I was put on seroxat and that worked wonderfully as well.
>
> I think I would have responded to any antidepressant I was given in my 20s but for some reason after hitting 35 I seem to have become resistant to everything.
>
> I did try prothiaden (doxepin) again at the age of 35, at much higher doses and it just caused me a lot of anxiety.
>
> Clomipramine is the second tricyclic I've tried (I'm now 43) and although it seems to be helping a bit, it's not helping nearly enough.
>
> It's strange really when I came off antidepressants at 31 I felt ok for three years. This time round though if I stop antidepressants (even though they don't work that well anyway anymore) I feel absolutely horrible. I feel like I'm in some kind of hell.
>
> I was thinking perhaps if I came off antidepressants for a year, just taking Zyprexa, that somehow my brain will revert back to normal and that the antidepressants will work again.

Do you feel that you can handle such a protracted period of abstinence and remain functional?

I understand perfectly your logic here. It is as good as any other. Unfortunately, with my brain, it seems that it "remembers" the drugs it has been exposed to in the past and is prepared to be resistant to them. My guess is that it has to do with genes being turned on indefinitely that produce proteins that affect neuronal membranes. There are either genes or gene combinations that are specific to a given drug, or that the area of the brain that each drug affects is somewhat different. That would explain why someone might build up a resistence to one SSRI and not another. In other words, I don't think going back to paroxetine after an extended drug holiday would somehow renew your responsivity to it. If anything, it might allow for a brief response at the beginning of treatment that fades quickly. Remember, though, this is only a guess of mine. Perhaps someone else can attest to experiencing otherwise.

That you have been responsive to two drugs as monotherapy is a good sign, I believe, that you will respond to combination treatment.

> I really don't know what else to do.

I'm sure we'll think of something.

Is there any history of mental illness in your family?

You can Babblemail me if you'd like.

I'm sure you've already done this, but could you make 3 lists?

- drugs and drug combinations that helped, no matter how much or for how long, even if side effects made them intolerable..

- drugs or drug combinations that made you feel worse.

- drugs that did nothing, but that were still tolerable.

- Scott

 

Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS

Posted by SLS on August 23, 2009, at 7:34:50

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS Meltingpot, posted by SLS on August 23, 2009, at 6:24:53

Another possibility is that the second messenger system of affected neurons is "primed" to effect quickly the transcription of those proteins that lead to resistence to a particular drug. Whatever the mechanism, many people do experience antidepressant-induced antidepressant refractoriness.

I am having a hard time believing that there is absolutely no treatment that will work for you. I commend you for not giving up after so many years. I believe that you will survive long enough to find a treatment that gives you back what you once had. Never give up.

I am hoping that the addition of lithium is the final key that brings me to remission. I am currently taking 5 drugs, each of which has been optimized through experimentation. For you, I think another good sign is that Zyprexa helps. You are not completely areactive to treatment.


- Scott

 

Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS

Posted by swan600 on August 25, 2009, at 15:23:35

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS, posted by SLS on August 23, 2009, at 7:34:50

HI I AM NEW TO THIS FOROM BUT I AM SO GLAD I FOUND IT .I TO HAVE A HARD TIME LIVING ,I I AM BI OLAR ,HAVE CHONIC FATIGUE ,BAD BACK AN JOINTS,FIBROMYALGIA,I HAVE HAD A HARD TIME FINDING SOMETHING THAT WILL WORK ON ME ..I HAVE A HIGH TOLERANCE FOR MEDS AN A LOW TOLERANCE FOR AIN..I HAVE JUST BEEN UT ON MF COTIN 15MG. 3 DAILY .IT IS NOT KILLING THE PAIN ..ALSO MY PRIMARY CARE STARTED ME ON A TRIEL PACK OF SAVELLA..I AM GETTING WEAKER FROM ALL OF THIS ..I AM NOW 60 YEARS OLD .THE THOGHT OF TAKING MY LIFE IS ALWAYS WITH ME ..BUT I CAN LIVE THIS DAY ..IT IS HARD BUT YOU KEEP ON GOING .I SEEM TO BE FEELING BEETER THE LAST COUPLE OF DAYS ..I HOPE IT CONTINUES ..IT IS HARD TO FIND A ANTIDEPRESSANT THAT WORKS FOR ME .I HAVE BEEN ON LEXAPRO FOR THE LAST FEW YEARS BUT IT ONLY KEEPS ME FROM GOING OVER THE EDGE IT DOES NOT MAKE ME SMILE. I HAVE TRIED TO TAKE MY LIFE ON SEVERAL OCASIONS ..THE LAST TIME I WAS ON A MACHINE FOR AWHILE .BUT I WANT TO LIVE ..I NEED TO LIVE ..SO DO YOU .I KNOW MY TRIGGERS NOW AN TRY TO AVOID THEM ..DO NOT GIVE UP ..THE NEXT TIME YOU HEAR SOMEONE KNOCKING OPEN THE DOOR..THERE IS MUCH TO BE SAID ..IT IS HARD TO GET THE DOCTERS TO UNDERSTAND ..AN GET TREATMENT THAT WORKS ..YOU GET TO WHERE YOU DO NOT KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPPEN ..JUST DO TODAY ..IT IS GOOD TO TALK WITH OTHERS WHO UNDERSTAND ..I HAVE A HUSBAND AN GRANDCHILD I CARE FOR PLUS A SON WHO IS DISABLED ..I AM SCRAPING THE SURFACE AN BARELY GETTING BY SOME DAYS I CAN HARDLY WALK OR THINK .I RESEARCH EVERYTHING LOOKING FOR ANSWERS ,BUT THE MOST IMPORTANT THING I DO IS PRAY ..I AM STILL HERE.

 

Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS swan600

Posted by SLS on August 25, 2009, at 16:24:48

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS, posted by swan600 on August 25, 2009, at 15:23:35

> Hi I am new to this forom but I am so glad I found it .I to have a hard time living ,I I am bi olar ,have chonic fatigue ,bad back an joints,fibromyalgia,I have had a hard time finding something that will work on me ..I have a high tolerance for meds an a low tolerance for ain..I have just been ut on mf cotin 15mg. 3 Daily .it is not killing the pain ..also my primary care started me on a triel pack of savella..I am getting weaker from all of this ..I am now 60 years old .the thoght of taking my life is always with me ..but I can live this day ..it is hard but you keep on going .I seem to be feeling beeter the last couple of days ..I hope it continues ..it is hard to find a antidepressant that works for me .I have been on lexapro for the last few years but it only keeps me from going over the edge it does not make me smile. I have tried to take my life on several ocasions ..the last time I was on a machine for awhile .but I want to live ..I need to live ..so do you .I know my triggers now an try to avoid them ..do not give up ..the next time you hear someone knocking open the door..there is much to be said ..it is hard to get the docters to understand ..an get treatment that works ..you get to where you do not know what will happpen ..just do today ..it is good to talk with others who understand ..I have a husband an grandchild I care for plus a son who is disabled ..I am scraping the surface an barely getting by some days I can hardly walk or think .I research everything looking for answers ,but the most important thing I do is pray ..I am still here.

Cymbalta might be good for you. It helps with depression and the pain of fibromyalgia.

You might also want to try adding Wellbutrin.

I hope you don't mind if I changed the capital letters of your post. All capital letters is difficult to read.


- Scott

 

Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS

Posted by swan600 on August 26, 2009, at 15:26:44

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS, posted by SLS on August 23, 2009, at 7:34:50

thank you ..i want to give savella a ter .it is a ssri an alson an norephendrine inhibiter..ia person who plan an thinks about it is is not healthy..if you felt well you would feel defferently..when people tell me to hang in there they do not realize what courage it takes live..i know what my purpose is an i also know it will be a good future..but that is not enough to stop the illness..if you will look an pray for truth you will fid it.in the meantime we wait an research an do the best we can a day at a time.

 

Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS

Posted by Swan600 on August 27, 2009, at 13:14:12

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS, posted by swan600 on August 26, 2009, at 15:26:44

i am 60 an sink an i just found i have herpes..help will it cause or has it caused some of the problems i have

 

Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS

Posted by Swan600 on August 27, 2009, at 14:34:24

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS, posted by Swan600 on August 27, 2009, at 13:14:12

let me explain i have fibro 10 yrs..bipolar since 20 .mones deteriating..chonic pain an fatigue..nerves that cannot take stimuly or stress..hysterectomy...i never feel good..always feel ill.i would of had to have it for 30 yrs.i have looked on net .mothing but i think it has a lot to do with my condition.i could use some info thanks

 

Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS Swan600

Posted by Phillipa on August 27, 2009, at 20:11:01

In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide - To SLS, posted by Swan600 on August 27, 2009, at 14:34:24

Swan I don't think herpes could cause this. Which kind of help are you looking for? Seriously I'd love to help. Love Phillipa lots of stuff going on.


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