Posted by SLS on August 17, 2009, at 5:53:26
In reply to Re: Thinking about suicide, posted by Maxime on August 16, 2009, at 22:11:19
> I really hope I die in my sleep tonight. If I ever fall asleep that is.
>
> I'm not in a good place right now.
It might be a little too early to be certain about your being doomed to be depressed for the rest of your life. Your brain has shown that it can be normalized for an extended period. It is just a matter of time before you find the right treatment to force it to function properly again.Are there any responsibilities that you can set aside temporarily? If not, then please remember that you are working with a handicap, and don't beat up on yourself unmercifully.
Also, remember that severe depression is timeless. It has no beginning and no end when you are in the midst of it. This sensation of timelessness begins from the very first day. This is one aspect of depression that allows people choose to exit life, even though they haven't been depressed for very long. It feels like forever.
I have some idea as to what it is like to feel hopeless. Do you feel hopeless right now? If not, then what thoughts are fueling the suicidality? Maybe there are no thoughts at all except for the sense of being overwhelmed by everything. Nothing is right. Everything is wrong. The depression itself might be acting as a substrate for a neurobiological suicidal state that would be there regardless of what you are thinking. This usually occurs in tandem with anxiety or anger.
Logically, you still have treatment alternatives that you have not yet explored. I think it is a bit premature to declare yourself as being doomed.
It is difficult to find the right words to comfort someone who is suicidal. There is a fear of saying the wrong thing that might push the depressed person closer to acting. I hope I have not made things worse.
You'll be alright.
- Scott
poster:SLS
thread:911201
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20090810/msgs/912544.html