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Re: Partlycloudy

Posted by alexandra_k on September 25, 2018, at 4:28:07

In reply to Re: Partlycloudy alexandra_k, posted by Clearskies on September 24, 2018, at 23:58:36

> I encourage you to start saving what you can, on a regular basis.

yeah. it just seemed sort of silly to when there are so many things i need. but of course 'need' is hard to quantify. and i have managed to survive without many things i 'need'. so...

there really is something psychologically to it.

i read something about this guy saying that an obvious place to start when it comes to halting the increasing inequality in the world was to stop with the increases for those who are the primary beneficiaries. so, for those who are the highest earners in the company to stop giving pay raises to themselves (to stop giving payraises to themselves at higher percentages than) the rest of the people in their organisation.

and i thought about how i certainly have had enough to eat this year. and to eat well. and i've... enjoyed things for a time (which has been nice since i've gone without for a time, and also had a time in residential halls and boarding houses where i didn't have cooking facilities / food storage space). but now it's time for me to get serious about a budget of how much i'm going to let myself spend in the supermarket. and if i blow it... well, it won't kill me to have a day of eggs on toast or whatever. but stick to the budget, yeah. just go 'enough'.

i have had enough this year to divide up my income. to... budget. instead of living week to week. yeah.

things came up. my motorcycle blew over in the wind (as i knew it would) and that bent the handlebar and wrecked the clutch lever. that ended up costing a few hundred. then that broke my back-stop. then i thought i should get some clothes since that had been... a long time coming... and i got cheap stuff for plodding around my house (which was what i needed, honestly) but there went my back-stop.

but there is something to dividing up a portion of each pay. and waiting a bit for some of those 'needed' things. for the sake of having something that is growing. however slowly. but there.

then the trick is in not spending it. blowing it on dental, or whatever.

this year (after the security guard incident) i ended up (finally finally) with this amazing work and income person. she helped me get into this house and get stuff i needed like a decent mattress (which was really freaking important to me becuase, honestly, i get most of my reading / writing done propped up in bed. always have. and a load of wood and i learned to write a bit by the fire, which was nice.

anyway... she's been just terrific. bike needed a new back tyre recently... and i was like 'i paid for an oil change and new filter but i can't afford the back tyre and fitting and the exhaust bracket needs welding'... and she was great about an emergency grant to get the rest of the stuff done.

and i guess that is the idea of insurance. you are left out of pocket. of course you are. otherwise the whole situation wouldn't make any sense at all. you are left out of pocket. but you aren't left so very much out of pocket as you would be otherwise. but, yeah, i need a backstop fund...

but also a savings fund that doesn't get touched no matter what.

only that latter thing... it is hard for me to know what sense to make of that... to know how to do that when i've been homeless and so on... the whole point of that is that it doesn't work when thingsa re that low and that is how i have been expected to live, here, so...

not anymore. not anymore. it's okay, now. it'll be okay.

i got a paper version of the university calander. that made me feel heaps better. something... legitmate. professional. there was stuff there on the assessment outcomes of the degree that i'm doing. it was different to what i thought. there are different outcomes. there is a 'fix your typos' (accepted minor changes) and a 'fix your typos and make a few minor changes' to be done within 10 weeks. and there is a 'go away and make some major changes and don't give it back to me for 6 months' and then there is an oral defence option and then there is a fail.

and that's what the regulations say. and i've been citing regulations at them left, right, and centre.

so when the dean threatens to fail it when i don't make it better in 2 weeks she's teasing. it hasn't been sent to examiners yet. she's just teasing me. not trying ot scare me or anything. she's teasing me.

i was feeling resentful that she was trying to scare me to work.

after reading teh calender i feel better about the whole thing... it was really kind of the library person to post it to me, too.

a few more days of trying to make it better...

i'm just so tired of it.




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