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Re: I wonder.... Mair

Posted by Cecilia on May 6, 2003, at 4:18:49

In reply to Re: I wonder.... Mair and » noa, posted by mair on May 1, 2003, at 21:15:50

Mair, I definitely relate to that feeling of not feeling "entitled" to my depression. Until I was 40 I just felt like I was born defective and that was that. Then came all the media coverage of repressed memories, "The Courage to Heal" etc. and I thought maybe it was possible that I wasn`t born defective, maybe something made me that way. So I went into therapy and 7 years and $40,000 later my therapist gave up on me, I was more depressed than ever, and I never got back a single repressed memory. At my parent`s funerals my sisters had so much obvious love for them and I have few memories and no feelng of connection to either parent. I`d just like to know WHY, what caused my rotten personality/life. Maybe it`s biological, but no med has ever worked. Mostly I just feel like I deserve to feel depressed but no right to "have" depression if that makes any sense. Cecilia

 

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