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Re: Thanks for the welcome » dougb

Posted by Jane D on May 29, 2001, at 9:42:59

In reply to Re: Welcome Jane!, posted by dougb on May 28, 2001, at 15:05:45

Doug,
Wow! What a welcome!

Where were you with your great advice about self acceptance 10 years ago. Of course, I wouldn't have believed you then. I would have "known" with absolute certainty that you were wrong and I really was undeserving. You, of course, clearly are not (undeserving that is). Irrational?

> I always used to beat myself up: not good enough, not trying hard enough, not worthy, etc, etc.
> A turning point for me, that is when i started to get better, was when i started saying: "Doug (that would be me), you are s-i-c-k, you do not want to be sick, if you were not sick, you would do many things diferently.
> Others will either realize that you are s-i-c-k and they will make a caring, loving adjustment in the way they treat you, if they do not - than that is _their_ defect not yours".

I'm lucky. Others HAVE made adjustments. Not everybody but some. I'm trying to figure out now when you go from "are sick" to "was sick". I think I've crossed that line recently. (Of course this is the world of continuums.) Which means I should be expecting fewer allowances to be made for me. I should be doing that for other people. Unless of course I'm still being as irrational as I was 10 years ago... Not really something I can expect feedback on from most of the people I deal with. Especially the nice ones.

I think you mentioned a while ago that you were finally finding some success with medication (which maybe should stay nameless on the social board - see I really have been reading). Are you still improving? Do you think you've crossed that line, that isn't a line but a continuum, yet?

Jane


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poster:Jane D thread:6181
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010526/msgs/6220.html