Posted by alexandra_k on September 29, 2013, at 22:41:37
In reply to Re: Psychology assessment, posted by baseball55 on September 27, 2013, at 22:22:16
I think maybe different therapists are different. I suspect most do think of their clients outside sessions. Which is why most do need to limit the number of very sick patients that they have. Which is a huge part of why it is that not many people will agree to work with me. I do think my last t was different... I think that that difference was what made him able to work with so many dissociative patients... I do believe... He was better at dissociating than I was... He was also able to be more in the moment, so I see why that part of therapy was appealing to him... But he seemed able to switch out of that at the end of the session whereas I could not.
The trouble with inpatient care... Is that we always have a significant shortage of beds just trying to keep up with the organically psychotic / catatonic individuals who just need a little bit of time before their meds kick in... That was why we eventually got DBT... Because it promised to keep a big chunk of people out of hospital. Hospital is typically not an option unless I'm in total crisis. Even then... It is variable. It depends on the severity / nature of the other cases...
So any clinician who agrees to work with me knows that that might well not be an option. So... Most won't go near me with a barge pole. Or... Well... Sometimes I do get clinicians who don't seem concerned by anything... That is worrying because typically they don't understand anything at all about how fragile I am.
They... I guess p-doc has happily fallen into an avoidant attachment kind of thing with me... Neither of us is particularly happy to see the other. There is a numbness / deadness to our interaction. T saw that... And she is seeming to be careful to stand side on etc etc etc... Isn't concerning herself about my not looking at her etc etc. At the end... When I asked her her name and looked at her (so I could reidentify her next time) she looked... Sheepish or something.
Unobtrusive.
That is what I am getting.
That is good. They need to be careful with me. Trouble is... ANy more careful... And they wouldn't even be there at all.
Sheepish... Unobtrusive... That isn't quite it.
Her heart sank. I saw that a little bit of her heart sank that I sort of connected / reached out to her just a little bit. I guess because it showed that part of me did want to engage with therapy. I wasn't totally dismissing her (I have had poor-fit relationships before where I could never reach out to them at all). I guess because she knows she's only going to hurt me really. IT would be better if i were properly autistic.
poster:alexandra_k
thread:1051233
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20130807/msgs/1051443.html