Posted by gazo on March 19, 2007, at 16:26:10
I am new here and I am sorry if it's inappropriate to post here instead of the newbi-whatever forum. I am just strung out and i don't have the mental energy to deal with how-de-do's right now. I need input.
I have read and read and read about transference. I get it. I even have some idea as to what the original unmet needs were, etc. But it has done nothing to help. But this is more complicated than just feeling in love... please read before you respond.
I am female, seeing a male therapist roughly my age. I am in a "less than ideal" relationship... please insert damaging if you please. I am stuck in the issues surrounding that. My gentle, empathetic and calm therapist is exactly what i need and want. In considering leaving my relationship it is no big surprise that I would become desperately attached. Not only is there transference but something also called a transitional object. I would be substituting my BF dependence with dependence on the therapist... and THEN deal with the secondary dependence in a safe environment. SOunds good right? Wrong.
I am unable to continue with the current T. Not my fault and not his either. He has taken a new job elsewhere. I have to see a new T.
But I feel torn apart. I don't know this new T well enough to discuss my feelings for my previous T. I understand the difference between *real* love and transference but it doesn't help. I feel like I am in love. I know very little about him but I have such strong feelings I can hardly think about anything else. And he is being taken from me before we can address it!
What do I do? I am embarrassed about it and the new T isn't someone I trust yet.. I have hope I will but I don't just yet.
I am afraid I will have a breakdown and end up in the hospital or worse.
I found posts on here from a gal who is having or had an affair with her T and I couldn't stop reading. Now I am completely obssessed with the thought of it.
please help.. what do i do?
poster:gazo
thread:742197
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070309/msgs/742197.html