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Re: such wonderful ideas... Pfinstegg

Posted by shrinking violet on April 3, 2005, at 17:00:00

In reply to such wonderful ideas..., posted by Pfinstegg on April 3, 2005, at 14:12:32

Thank you so much. I think I may take your idea of printing out some of my posts, and some responses (such as yours!) that may help bring out some of these painful and embarrassing issues. Thank you.


> I thought every one of your ideas for getting to termination in as constructive and healthy a way as possible were just wonderful - and clearly the result of a lot of thought. I hope you can see her weekly, and set a date. Your posts are all so clear about the real reason for your behavior- your fear, pain, dread and rage about losing her. If you get "off-track" in a session because of that, perhaps you could have copies of your very insightful posts in hand- and maybe copies for her. I think it would be very helpful to read and discuss them together. It's just a shame to start hating yourself because of your own longings, which are all so natural, and left-over from unmet needs of your childhood- not to mention being part of us all for our entire lives.. It sounds as though you are moving towards working together with her as a partner to help you through the termination- that's so healthy. i think it's our rage at being abandonned that makes terminations so hard. It can be so hard to keep in mind that rage and love exist at the same time, in equal strength, can't it? I do hope you'll be able to terminate so that you will be able to take some good things- about you, her and your relationship- with you, but you do need her help in expressing all the powerful feelings involved. She may need to grow into a better therapist to bear all of this with you, but, if you give her a chance, she probably will. I think therapists do think of their own lives as opportunities for growth through handling the most intense feelings they and others have. She is probably going to really miss you, too, you know


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poster:shrinking violet thread:478498
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050329/msgs/479378.html