Posted by BarbaraCat on October 13, 2003, at 16:52:12
In reply to Antabuse, posted by katia on October 13, 2003, at 14:30:29
Oh, that's great. 8 days! That seems like a long time to me lately. There was a time a few years ago when I was completely abstaining. But that's because I felt so lousy with fibro I didn't feel like drinking. The desire just wasn't there. I wonder why?
I go 3-4 days and begin to feel very good but then someone comes over and I'll slip up. I have learned a trick, however, and that is to do hard liquor or a orangerita (fresh OJ fresh lime and tequila). I only want just one of any hard alcohol drink and have no effect the next day. There's got to be something about wine that has my unlucky number on it.
I know what you mean about de-alc wine. It tastes like spoiled grape juice. Why bother. I wouldn't drink crummy bland chablis or other rot gut so why torture myself with watered down swampy skunk bilge? On the other hand, they've got the beer thing together (O'Douls is one I like) so I wonder why not wine?
Have you read "Rational Recovery" by Jack Trimpey? What you're talking about with just committing to stopping and the addictive sneaky little demon voice is pure AVRT (arrrgh! reminds me I haven't ordered ARVO yet!). I keep hoping I can confine it to moderation and for the most part I can. I still haven't figured out where that resolve breaks down, but maybe trying to figure it out is just another rationale for the Beast voice to buy time.
Sorry you're still off your feed. I was out shopping the other day outside of Portland and I'd swear every other person was sneezing and hacking. I started feeling it and gulped down the Yin, which I keep in the car for just those occasions. Oh, here's some more things to try if you don't already know about them:
1. Put some hydrogen peroxide (the standard 3% soltuion) into a dropper bottle and put a few drops in your ear, laying down on one side and pulling your earlobe to get the H2O2 in. Wait til the fizzing subsides, usually 10 minutes, then do the other ear. Works really well cause the eustacion tubes are one of the main points of entry for bacteria and viruses.
2. Fresh ginger tea. Chop up a big chunk, about 1/4 cup and simmer for 20 minutes. Mix with honey and fresh lemon juice to taste. Yum! It's heating and an anti-viral. I usually put brandy in it if I want to get some extra heat and sleep, but maybe that's not such a good idea for us these days.
How are you doing with lamictal? I've raised it to 150 from 125 and am ready to go up to 175 over the next few weeks. Been feeling a little down, but think the hot tub workouts are going to help alot. Hey, how's the belly dancing troupe going? I have to admire you for being able to maintain consistency with anything like that. I know I can't. I start with big plans and then can't sustain it and feel like I've let myself and everyone else down. But really, we must be compassionate with ourselves. I think about how beating myself up is so counterproductive. Would I even think about tying a little plow to my cat's backs and whipping them to plow my vegetable garden? Or being mean to them for any reason instead of trying to teach them through love and encouragement? No way and I'm not sure why I do it to myself. Anyhow, good luck to us in keeping our resolve to not hurt ourselves on our substances or any other way. Love ya, Barbara