Posted by TexasChic on May 2, 2006, at 16:42:01
In reply to Not nagging » Racer, posted by TexasChic on May 1, 2006, at 20:41:54
The whole thing with being ignored and isolated is upsetting, but I've realized the real underlying cause of what gets me upset involves Cuteboy. Today I went in still indignant and pissed off and knew I needed to let go of that dream. So I avoided eye contact and didn't speak to him all day. I was okay until for some reason, in the last two hours I got really upset about it. From past experience I know if I ignore him he's going to retreat even further. But even knowing that, and knowing he can't possibly care about me much more than a casual aquiantance, in the back of my mind I guess I still held out hope. I mean, logically I know its not going to happen, but yet somewhere inside I cant let it go. So for about the past two hours I cried silently at my desk. I knew what I wanted was for him to say something to me, to express concern that I was upset with him, but I also knew that wasn't going to happen. How do you deal when the person you like so much doesn't feel the same? I just feel heartbroken. As much as it tears at my heart, I hope I get that job just so I can get away from him and never see him again. How else am I ever going to get over this? I just can't stop crying.
-T
poster:TexasChic
thread:635629
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060422/msgs/639331.html