Posted by Omega Woman on January 4, 2004, at 12:18:02
In reply to How depression lowers testosterone in 3 ways » fallsfall, posted by Omega Woman on January 4, 2004, at 11:42:57
The reason i'm going on about this subject is because I felt this pressure happen later on, well past age 23, by which time I had already been sexually active and sure of my desire for women. And sure that I have never had any for men.
However the experience of depression since that age meant moving to a different group within Scotland. Once again the Macho culture existed. With the loss in sex drive through depression once again the social pressure started and the "gay" accusations, especially being the creative type anyway. Since being percieved as gay would have elevated my status within the creative community, I was quite happy to entertain the idea. A couple of years of being a flamboyant man in Bohemia came to a head when I had a gay man naked with me, as he sat there , I just felt nothing at all, much like being in a mens shower.
I though that Perhaps if I had'nt been depressed I might have had sex with him just for the sake of it, but then if I was'nt depressed I would'nt have gone through all the homophobic accusations tht led me to being there with the guy asking myself these questions and having fun with gay identity.
I just feel lucky that i've been on the inside of whats going on in Scotland, and to get a personal insight into what people do. I've seen what its done to others. I saw this happen to a friend of mine. He too started exploring homosexuality after depression and Scottish culture.
It makes men think they are gay when they are not.
The reason is just that scots dont like any grey area within sexuality, your either behaving like a man or the questions get asked and then you get fitted up like a female, but its not spoken about properly. Its within those silences that the seeds of doubt grow.
Just dont ask me why I choose to call myself "Omega Woman" ?
poster:Omega Woman
thread:296268
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031229/msgs/296347.html