Posted by fluffykitty on October 2, 2001, at 11:36:11
In reply to suicidal pms, posted by sar on September 29, 2001, at 2:48:47
> i've always been too depressed and distracted
>to keep track of (sometimes irregular) cycle.
>but right now i'm boalted, cramping, and
>obsessed with thoughts of going to the 24-hr
>Home Depot to buy the silky kind of rope.
I read the others responses.
I want to tell people something I heard when I saw a guru speak at a gathering. She said that when we are old and die it is like our body is the skin of a ripe fruit being peeled away to reveal the fruit within, in that our ripe soul peels away from and leaves the body to go on to a new beginning not an end. I always liked this analogy and it made me think that people who die from means other than natural are not ripe so to speak, their souls are not ready to leave and must come back and be born again in the body of another. So if I think of suicide or being killed before my time that maybe I would just end of having to do it all over again, keep repeating the cycle until I get it right. And I dont know if I want to do that, I would rather die ripe and go through the good and the bad that life brings me.
They say that the death of someone is hardest on those left behind. And when one is feeling fine you realize you would never want to bring that pain on those who are close to you, your family etc. However when you are feeling bad, then its hard to care about that, it all just doesnt matter at that point. But then when you feel better again you realize this again and dont want to really do it.