Posted by littleone on February 4, 2007, at 20:05:27
In reply to Re: Telling T big bad secret memory » littleone, posted by Daisym on February 3, 2007, at 20:08:55
> I'm glad you captured it all on paper, littleone, and now you can tuck it away until Tuesday.
Yeah, it is all captured there. I like the idea that it can’t escape or just drift apart into thin air. I lose thoughts, experiences, memories so easily. They just float away. Now it’s set in concrete and waiting for my T. And yeah, tucked away is exactly right. Have tried to do that. Don’t want to overwhelm myself by keeping it out and working/worrying over it.
> Does your husband know? Talking it over with him might help. But if nothing else, tell him you need peace and gentleness right now.
No way. Definitely not. I think it came out this weekend because he went away for the weekend so I was home alone and it was safe to let things out. It was safe to let go and wail and cry. He’s back now and the nice mask is back in place. It feels worse now that things *have* to be tucked away because he’s there rather than just *wanting* to tuck them away for my own benefit. I don’t think I can even tell him I need peace and gentleness. Hopefully he will be pretty relaxed anyway after his weekend away.
> It is always amazing to me that as much as I've said out loud, then next thing to say is equally hard. But the only way to healing is through it and the only way through it is to name it, feel it and finally figure out how to accept it as part of your history.
I know what you say is so right, but ugh. I wish this was easier. Just focus on the baby steps.
> It has been quiet here, hasn't it?
I wasn’t sure if I was just imagining that or if it was real. It’s certainly felt quiet to me. Makes me antsy.
poster:littleone
thread:729410
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070203/msgs/729780.html