Posted by alexandra_k on September 22, 2006, at 8:13:58
In reply to Re: Blame - Trigger » alexandra_k, posted by sunnydays on September 22, 2006, at 7:36:35
> But people aren't collectively outraged about volcanos exploding because there would be nothing we could do to stop them if we wanted to.
Ya. Volcanoes are a hard one. But I figure there are people studying volcanoes trying to learn how to better predict their behaviour so they can give advanced warnings to prevent people being hurt by them and stuff. I'm just saying that I'm not sure that collective outrage is necessary for people to work to interveane. And so I'm wondering... What collective outrage is really doing...
(Trying to raise public consciousness Hacking says.)
> the two choices for me right now are to blame my brother or to internalize the negative feelings so that I feel bad about myself.
Why are they your only choices? Why can't you just say that your brother did x and a result of that is that you feel... Whatever negative feelings you feel. I don't understand why failure to blame your brother necessitates you blaming yourself? I don't understand what work blame is supposed to do...
> I need to go through a period of blaming my brother in order to get the negative feelings out and feel what it is like to not hate myself.
Why can't you work on accepting your negative feelings as understandable responses to what happened? I don't see why or how blaming your brother helps...
> I don't think there is another way to get those negative feelings out of myself
Why can't you work on accepting them as feelings that you are having. We don't choose our feelings... They just are.
> at least my therapist doesn't seem to think so.
Hmm...
> But I don't know if later I will stop blaming or not.
It is your choice.
poster:alexandra_k
thread:686272
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060911/msgs/688122.html