Posted by All Done on July 26, 2005, at 0:46:08
In reply to Re: Oops » All Done, posted by fallsfall on July 24, 2005, at 11:34:56
*** AllDone, this sounds like backpedaling to me. When I read your first response to Dinah, I "heard" that there are times when you want more support from us, but you don't feel comfortable asking for it. You and 90% of the other people at Babble. I certainly didn't "hear" that you were complaining that we weren't supportive. You don't think that you are "worthy" of our support, so you don't want to ask for it. But I vehemently disagree with that.
Well...maybe there was some backpeddling, but I like to think of it as working through my thoughts with you guys. I will say, there are times I get nervous about asking for support here, but in the big scheme of the thing that is my life, I ask for more support here than anywhere else.
As for feeling "worthy", all I can say is that's a tough one for me.
***I have never seen you be even close to "too much". You know, Daisy worries about this all the time. Can you recognize that her worries are blown out of proportion? Can you see that perhaps yours are in the same direction?I do see that my worries are blown out of proportion. Sometimes (or even most of the time) I recognize it when I'm in the middle of the worry. I just don't know what to do about it.
*** Call her and tell her that you miss her. Invite her to come over for lunch or a dessert swim or something. Or just chat on the phone with her. Do you send email with her? I find that email is the easiest when people are busy, because you and they don't have to be talking at the same time - they can respond to your email at their convenience.
Now you sound like my T. Last week, he started to tell me I should talk to her about missing her and he stopped himself midstream and made a comment like, "oh wait, you wouldn't *actually* want to *talk* to her about what's bothering you."
I said, "please don't be sarcastic or say anything that might lead me to feel accused or put down." Or maybe I just laughed and rolled my eyes at him. :-P
*** Have you tried deepening the relationship with your Moms-with-kids friends? You might find that they are starved for the same thing you are.I have tried with one of my neighbors and I will continue to try. Sometimes I think the fact that I work full-time puts a bit of a barrier in the relationship (for both of us). But like I said, I'll continue to try - with her and others.
*** Well, all I can say is that I had a great time at the zoo...
I did, too, falls. I wish I lived closer to you and lots of other Babblers.
*** I second Dinah's opinion that you are good enough for anyone.
Thank you :).
*** I'm so glad you are here on this board, AllDone. I'm looking forward to seeing more of who you are.Thanks for being here with me, falls!
poster:All Done
thread:532059
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050725/msgs/533617.html