Posted by Daisym on June 22, 2005, at 16:28:40
In reply to Re: Confusing Session, posted by Aphrodite on June 22, 2005, at 15:12:21
> I also told him I was tired of leaving sessions upset and in pieces, it was too hard to keep trying to put myself back together.
<<<I would be interested in how he responded to this. Are you feeling like that all the time or just lately since this subject has arisen?
******I think I'm feeling like this because I can't get to what I want to say until the last 10 minutes and then of course I'm frustrated that I have to stop. He said we could try to stop sooner so we could talk about stopping, but he worries that I'll be even more frustrated with being cut off. I think it has a lot to do with feeling so lonely and left out and even a bit jealous. I haven't felt these things before about his other clients or his "real" life. I need to get a handle on them quick!>We talked about my attempt to build another triangle (a reenactment) similar to my mom, my dad and myself. It got uncomfortable and I moved away from it.
Maybe you should gently return to this? If you're anything like me, wanting to divert and change topics means I have gotten dangerously close to something powerful.
****I'm sure we need to return to this. I just couldn't. It is too fresh a wound with seeing them both together last week. I can't even write about this, I fall asleep at the key board or have to get up and do something else. The anxiety goes sky high.
You weren't long winded at all. I appreciate you sharing your experience. I do think it all gets easily confused. The question on the table is "Is sex currency, and if it is, how am I willing to use it?" I really need to figure out the answer to that one.I'm counting on you to help me get through the next two weeks. I keep telling him I'll be "fine" --but the not so secret truth is that I don't think I will. I think I'll be a mess. Who knows?
poster:Daisym
thread:516928
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050622/msgs/517159.html