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Re: Yikes! Now I've done it! » Daisym

Posted by Aphrodite on February 16, 2005, at 18:41:39

In reply to Yikes! Now I've done it!, posted by Daisym on February 15, 2005, at 21:07:33

Just a view from the other side, for whatever it is worth. . .

It's a long story (actually you know it, Daisy), but through no fault of my own, my T "exposed" me to at least 2 other of his um . . . needy clients. They both intruded on my time, and I pressed him until I got details about why this was OK. It was very, very clear that these 2 clients were in bad shape and quite dependent on him. He shared, because I pressed, that one he talks to 7 days a week to keep her OK and that he had to reduce sessions down from what used to be several hours.

So, I know without ever asking that he has a difficult caseload. I was so morbidly curious as to what was going on with these patients who intruded on our sessions.

My therapy has never been the same since. I would give anything to not know about this. The spectre of these other clients invade my boundaries and space. I wonder, did he have one of the patients today? Did they break down again? He looks tired -- I should tell him I'm OK so I don't overwhelm him. I can't tell you how much I close up in a desire to take care of him.

It has gotten so bad recently, as I often know if one of the two patients come before or after me, that he has had to completely redo my schedules so I don't pass them because it affects so much of what I do (or don't do) in therapy.

My advice is this: you may *think* you want to know, but you really don't. You need to trust that he has a caseload he can manage. I worry about it all the time and would give anything to have this information stricken from my mind. I worry for the patients, I worry for him, and in so doing, my therapy suffers.

But I understand the desire to want to know. It was very powerful for me, too.


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