Posted by NVDeb on July 10, 2004, at 12:31:25
In reply to Re: Do you and your t. say l love you ever?, posted by NVDeb on July 10, 2004, at 6:26:15
Wow, so many responses! I didn't think people would come back to this thread... it seems like an active board.
I went to the chat sponsored by past About.com hosts, and the response was very negative. That it was entirely inappropriate, that she might feel I crossed a line and asked me to stop seeing her and recommend another therapist, that she was a therapist and not a friend and "love" is not a word for professional settings, that she is there just because it's a job. No one would recommend telling her I love her.
What do you respond to that?
Now I'm all confused :(
BTW... I have surgery coming up on the 21st... and I was going to give her something of mine to hold until I came back (a little statue of someone doing Karate with my favorite saying engraved on it "Veni, Vidi, Velcro, I came, I saw, I stuck around")... I'm not scared of death because I don't think I'll die but I'm scared of falling into a coma, so I was going to tell her that I wanted an anchor or a marker so that when it was time to come back from the nether-netherworld I could find my way back.What do you think of that? (I'm 26 years old and this will be my first surgery... it's nothing major, it's going through the ear canal, cutting out a bone, and putting a plastic one in its place... I think that the older you are when you your first surgery the worst it is).
While I'm at it I have another question: I left her a message (I forgot to bring this up during out weekly session) that I had a Karate testing next week (I'm a black belt) and invited her over... I let her know that I may not talk to her during the actual testing because my family might be there and I'm not ready to let them know that I go to therapy (we belong to the same gym and she has said that if we see each other it's up to me if I talk to her, that she would follow my lead), but that I would definitely talk to her during out next session. I left her the message the day before yesterday and still no reply, which gives me a sick feeling in my stomach since she usually answers voicemail within a day. Think I crossed the line with that one?Whatever I do, I want to ask her what she would do if I do something that crosses the line as a patient (I'm not about to start stalking her or even ask her out to lunch... we belong to the same gym and I avoid the one she goes to on purpose... I don't want to encroach on her personal life). Now the people at the chat room got me all nervous about her feeling cornered and asking me to go to another therapist. It's hard when you finally make an emotional connection with someone after not really having any emotional connections most of your life. How do you act? What is too much?
Thanks for listening :)
poster:NVDeb
thread:323332
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040703/msgs/364731.html