Posted by pseudoname on December 15, 2005, at 13:39:23
In reply to Re: What a great post to read. Thanks » pseudoname, posted by ed_uk on December 14, 2005, at 16:19:17
> How is your mood? What dose are you taking right now?
My mood – on buprenorphine – is pretty good. I'd say bupe gives me 40-95% mood improvement every day. But another key benefit for my particular problem: when I accomplish something good in the course of a day, ON BUPE I don't freak out about it later. It's hard to explain, but bupe keeps that bizarre post-success panic away. Not even benzos did that for me.
That is what I've wanted for 10+ years.
I take 2 mg Subutex tablet early in the morning and about 1 mg about 1:00 PM. (Oh! Be right back.....) It takes 1-2 hours to get any mood/thought benefit. The first dose wears off after 4-8 hours, but the second dose can last into the night.
I've taken a few drug holidays (36-48 hrs without bupe), and the worst foul thoughts come back toward the end. Off bupe, I'm always semi-suicidal. The only physiological withdrawal symptom I've had so far is headache.
> How's the constipation and which laxatives/doses are you taking?!
LOL. My drug holidays were mostly for pooping, but constipation is a little less recently.
I bought the stimulant Dulcolax® (bisacodyl) at your encouragement and magnesium citrate (at Matt's suggestion). So far I haven't had to open either one. I also stocked up on wax suppositories, which aren't much help.
I'm still taking 17g of Miralax every day. I haven't taken milk of magnesia in 2 weeks or so.
OTHER SIDE EFFECTS: My mental ability is better now. I can read books, which I couldn't do at first on bupe at all.
Two different times off bupe, I had absent-minded cognitive problems. I did little things on the computer that I never realized at all! A couple weird things like that. Definitely worth noting.
I still have no real drive or interests. Until a couple years ago, I had dreams & plans even when I was very depressed. Maybe I'm just getting old. Maybe another AD or some other drug on top of the bupe might work now? Maybe if I keep working, exposing myself to rewarding situations, etc, I'll start coming alive again.
Thanks for asking. Peace to you, Ed.