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Re: A glass of dopamine BarbaraCat

Posted by katia on September 3, 2003, at 0:24:53

In reply to Re: A glass of dopamine katia, posted by BarbaraCat on September 3, 2003, at 0:03:08

I actually was taking L-tyrosine along with the periodic 5-HTP when an inkling of a thought told me I might be suffering from depression (a year and a half ago when I was in Scotland); it was finally occuring to me that not everyone lived so whacked out like me. And when I was taking it, I fell into a suicidal depression; so I don't think it did much for me at that time. I am definitely up for trying it but as I have this metabolic testing tomorrow and then my pdoc's appt. on Friday, I'll try and remember to mention it to both of them and see what they say about amino acids/vitamins in the good ole' cure for craziness.

I just had another thought re: feeling too good to stay there. (oh, btw, I meant that not good enough for good - what I meant by that is maybe some self-destructive demonish part of me doesn't allow me to be happy - so I reach for the chardonnay?)
but the other thought on that is, after all these years of intense wild rides of trouble, chaos, and depth of feeling, maybe content is SCARY because it might be BORING. Maybe there's a part of that going on in my subconscious too. Fear of boredom so self-sabotaging to get some action????? Or maybe afraid of what I actually can do and BE? afraid of my strength and power and potential.
It's all so very complicated =:-(
at the end of the day, all I need is food, love, and affection!!!! yea right.
nighty night.




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