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Re: Partlycloudy

Posted by alexandra_k on September 28, 2018, at 17:49:37

In reply to Re: Partlycloudy, posted by alexandra_k on September 28, 2018, at 17:39:06

and when i submitted my softcopy i emailed the dean and my supervisior to say that i'd done it and my supervisor starts YELLING AT ME BY EMAIL that it is NOT READY and HOW DARE I DO THAT and i will be FAILED OUT and so on.

because i am not going to stay in teh field and so she has nothign to lose?

i don't really understand.

and then she starts up about how she has to write this thing and so on...

and I'm like: just do the f*ck*ng thing, already. it asks you for your opinion just state your opinion, already.

I guess she wanted a tea party where I pander to her for however long to try and ply her into a warm and fuzzy mood so that she no longer wishes to murder me in my sleep.

I'm not the kind of person who can put on a false smile in the pandering kind of a sense. I have no game like that. I just don't. I don't appreciate it when people treat me like that and I don't treat others like that. Maybe it is a deficit that I am unable to play this game when this is the game that people want me to play. I think about how much of my life has been wasted by people who have lied to my face because they thought they could get away with it and they tell themselves that it was kinder that way that they were just socially smoothing or whatever... It's disingenuous. It lacks integrity. This whole mode of social interaction...

But people mostly seem to want to kill / destroy / exclude me because of it, yeah. Especially when they see that I'm capable of doing things...

It's these awful people in charge of those at the lowest levels who will not allow the people in their vicinty to get started. And I'm not young enough to be able to huddle in with a school leaver herd and there arent' mature students...

Everyone really has just left this country.




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