Posted by baseball55 on April 2, 2014, at 21:57:12
In reply to Re: divorce?, posted by alexandra_k on April 2, 2014, at 20:34:19
> you are very smart. much smarter than me about money matters... sounds like you are figuring things out... sounds like... things haven't really been that great between you guys for a while now? you seemed to move pretty swiftly into wanting to leave and figuring out those logistics... he might be feeling better now that he's been open about things. that he isn't being deceptive anymore. i think that on some level all but the most psychopathic don't like being two-faced... it takes it's toll...
Good point. Hadn't thought of it that way, but it makes sense.
>
> really talk to a lawyer about what seems likely... to help you figure / plan logistics. of course you might end up settling out of court for a bit less (and a lot less court costs) but a genuine threat of whatever can be most helpful in getting the ball rolling in that direction...
>I think we need to meet with a lawyer together so he can understand what the courts would probably rule. This is a community property state -- everything split down the middle, no-fault divorce. Alimony likely given length of marriage and difference in earnings. If a lawyer explained this, he might settle down.
But after that, everyone tells me we should hire a mediator to negotiate final terms. Less expensive, less conflictual. Then hire a lawyer jointly to file all the paperwork.
Having two lawyers - one apiece - to conflict and negotiate and represent us in hostile court proceedings - is a great way to eat through our savings.
poster:baseball55
thread:1063324
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20140312/msgs/1063592.html