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Re: I *need* to do well in school » alexandra_k

Posted by Deneb on July 31, 2005, at 18:28:04

In reply to Re: I *need* to do well in school, posted by alexandra_k on July 31, 2005, at 17:22:57

> This is where a councellor could help you a lot.

I'm desperate...I'm willing to try anything...get "help" or whatever...I will not ruin my life because of this! I have to get myself together and stay together!

> And a study group if you can manage to get into one that is at a suitable level.

I've never been in a study group...I'm very shy IRL and don't really talk. It's horrible. How am I going to make it in this world? That's it, I have to seriously get some help for my problems. I'll do whatever needs to be done! I want to succeed!

> You will be alright. You might need to repeat the courses you didn't finish...

I don't know if things are going to be all right...I've seriously messed up my GPA. I'm also seriously behind because I had to drop a lot of courses for my mental breakdowns. I know I really should get at least a Masters because the field I study is very competitive and right now I'm not even in the competition!

The way I calm myself down is by saying to myself that I will do it eventually if that is really what I *want* to do. I'm in no real rush. I'm willing to work "crappy" jobs to pay for uni and I don't need to move out any time soon...although it would probably be good life experience for me to do so. I'm not in a rush to get things done. I'll be ok. There are worst fates than not going to grad school.

> In the future... One word for you... If you absolutely have to go to the mall instead of going to the exam: compassionate withdrawal.

I don't like to be an exception in these cases. Once I got an extension for an essay and I felt so guilty about it that I couldn't write the final exam essay and ended up failing the course (which was an "easy" course everyone was supposed to pass)...Bioethics, aka medical ethics. I did really well the second time around...see how I f*ck things up for myself?

When I do things like not show up for an exam, I'm actually in a suicidal state...I'm convinced that I will kill myself so why bother stressing out about an exam? Then I continue living and realize how much I screwed things up. I'm afraid I'm going to end up being one of those students who kill themselves over bad grades. :-(

I can think of so many times where I should have been locked up for my safety. I just need to get my B.Sc., then things will get better...or not. :-(

Deneb


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poster:Deneb thread:535880
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