Posted by Deneb on July 31, 2005, at 1:00:43
My grades are a disaster...they are either A's or D's it seems.
In several classes I even failed to show up for the final exam...leading to an "incomplete"=failure. :-( What a horrible way to fail! I was seriously messed up at times...wandering the malls like a "crazy" person instead of going to my exams.
I seriously *have* to get my act together before school starts and make sure that I *stay* together!...That is a BIG problem for me. Usually I do well enough in my first semester but somehow the stress overwhelms me after the holiday break during Dec. and I do horribly the next semester...I mean really really badly!
There is something seriously wrong with my brain at times...I just CANNOT concentrate on anything like studying during those times.
When I feel good, studying is not a big deal and I actually remember things! I find I don't even need to study that much if I just go to all of my classes. It's amazing! I feel so good about doing well and I feel smart too. I'm utterly amazed that I have the ability to be at or near the top of the class when I can concentrate and study. All that time I thought I was a complete and total idiot who probably could not finish university.
When I feel badly, I write notes for hours and hours and I cannot retain any information! I don't think I'm even studying! I just cannot *think* or something! It's horrible! This just CANNOT happen again! This happens every year and my academic life is going to be absolutely screwed if I don't fix whatever the heck is wrong with me quick!
I cannot learn when I'm messed up!
I got a brief glimpse of what I'm capable of doing and now I have to repeat it! I just cannot believe how I screw up my grades with my instability...is it even worth it anymore? Aaahh...my life is over! My GPA is messed up! I'm never going to get my B.Sc. I'm never going to get into grad school. I'm never going to get a job.
Aaahh! I'm freaking out! What's going to happen with my life? What the heck am I going to do? I really messed things up!
poster:Deneb
thread:535880
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050726/msgs/535880.html