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Re: I fired my t » alexandra_k

Posted by Dinah on June 19, 2009, at 0:35:47

In reply to Re: I fired my t, posted by alexandra_k on June 19, 2009, at 0:11:06

I understand that.

One of the major issues my therapist has hammered home for fourteen years is my asking directly for what I want or need. He says that if I ask, the answer may be no, but if I don't ask, the answer is definitely no, because no one is able to read my mind.

He also says that there is no shame in asking for anything ever, even if it isn't something that he can grant. He says that if he says no, it doesn't have anything to do with my asking for something "wrong". It just means that he is unable to give what I am asking for.

I usually believe him. But not always. And even when I ask him very directly, I often build in an out for him so that his no won't hurt as bad.

 

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poster:Dinah thread:900834
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090614/msgs/901963.html