Posted by lucie lu on October 11, 2008, at 22:48:27
In reply to ((((Lucie Lu)))) » lucie lu, posted by Wittgensteinz on October 11, 2008, at 18:48:58
> (((LL))) I'm sorry things are so tough for you right now. Fibromyalgia sounds terribly unpleasant. Health problems can be such a burden and make one feel helpless. I think this could well be a factor in your depression. Plus the added helplessness you feel in regard to your DH, friends and family. You need their support but you feel you can't ask for it - perhaps you are supporting those around you when really you don't have the energy to?
Witti, you are so right about the correlation between helplessness and depression. I get so frustrated when my efforts don't get me anywhere with the FM. Usually I can get through a flare-up without this much trouble by doing things, like aerobic exercise, that work best for me. But I guess I do have a lot on my plate right now emotionally and it is taking a toll on me physically, independent of my efforts. And yes, it is distressing not to be able to rely on family and friends right now.
> What you said to me the other day helped me a lot - I don't think you should be afraid to call on others for support and understanding - you clearly are a person who goes out of her way to support others. I don't think you should feel bad about needing more from your T - why not let him support you as much as you need to help get you through this period? Be kind to yourself.
I'm glad you felt helped by what I said. Funny how we can give others good advice that we have trouble taking ourselves, isn't it?
> You talk of a deep, insatiable need to be held, cuddled by your T. I know this feeling - I know this pain - this is something I experience intensely with my T. He won't physically hold me. He used the imagery once of him as a life-buoy that I held onto and said I could hold on as long as I needed to. I liked this image, the idea that he is stopping me from sinking - he's just making sure my head stays above the water. It made my neediness seem more reasonable, understandable to me - it made me feel less uncomfortable/ashamed about leaning on him.
I like that imagery. Maybe because I swim, I appreciate water metaphors, and a psychological buoy is a good one.
> I really hope you begin to feel better again before long - in the mean time, please don't be afraid to get the help you need from your T. He sounds like a great T btw.
I feel you really understand, Witti, and thank you so much for your support and comforting words.
Lucie
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poster:lucie lu
thread:856911
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081005/msgs/857007.html