Posted by peddidle on February 16, 2007, at 12:28:35
In reply to Re: Looks like I just quit therapy, posted by wishingstar on February 16, 2007, at 9:33:03
Wishingstar,
I am not going to try to talk you out of your decision, but I am going to tell you my thoughts on your situation.
I know all too well about wanting to get better, but not wanting to do the stuff that it takes to get better. I have been seeing my current T for roughly 2 or 3 years, and I still don't think I'm there yet. I keep going, though. Wanting to get better, but not having the energy or the motivation to do it is part of the illness. I'm sure Ginny understands that.
You said that you still feel like you need Ginny. Do you think that maybe you are trying to push her away before you get too attached? I know that feeling, and I fight with it every day. She wants to help you; you are not wasting her time.
I know it could feel worse if any kind of social gathering went badly. I am dealing with this too. You're right, it is safer to just avoid the situation altogether, and not risk the pain. But if you never take that risk, you could also be missing out on some really good times. Yes, some of them may end badly, but you will always have the good times to look back on. Can we ever truly know happiness unless we have tasted sadness? Can we ever feel real comfort unless we have felt pain?
>
> I really am trying. It's just not good enough.**That's the depression talking, and I'm sure you know that. Just being able to say "I really am trying" means that you are doing well enough.
>
> I called my psychiatrist today to try and get an earlier appt. I've been off all meds for about 7 weeks and dont go in until the 28th.**I'm sure some of what you're feeling will be alleviated once you get your meds figured out. It is also good that you kept your appointment with Ginny for next week; you should hear her thoughts about the email you sent her.
If you want to take a break from therapy, that is your decision. I'm sure it can be beneficial to venture out into the real world and reflect on what you have learned. If you think that it will be good for you to see how well you can manage on your own, then you have every right to do that. Taking a break may help you realize what you truly want to accomplish, and give you some insight as to how to reach your goals. If you decide to take a break, maybe you could ask Ginny if she would mind if you sent her an email once in a while (every month or so), just to update her. Knowing that you can still keep in contact with her on an informal basis might make you feel better.
I'm sorry if any of this sounded like a lecture, and I can understand if you don't listen to any of it. As I'm sure you know, this is all very "do as I say, not as I do". You have been very helpful to me, and I wanted to try and return the favor.
Let us know what you decide.
((((wishingstar)))) (teddy bear hugs)
poster:peddidle
thread:733206
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070215/msgs/733289.html