Posted by madeline on November 19, 2006, at 13:33:34
In reply to please...., posted by sunnydays on November 18, 2006, at 21:09:46
Sunny,
It sounds as though our therapy progression is very similar.
I so wanted my therapist to be my dad. I just wanted to sit in his lap and have him make all the bad stuff just go away. I wanted to go to his house for thanksgiving and the holidays.
Dealing with that was very very hard for me. It came with the realization that the care I had has a child was horrible and I had been cheated. The parenting I was entitled to as a human being I did not get.
The grief, the longing and the frustration was almost overwhelming and I channeled it all into my therapist.
I got through it and you will too.
Self soothing is important, but it is also a natural human trait to reach out to others for comfort and reassurance.
We should have gotten our fill of this reasurance and safety as children and, as a result, should be better able to cope with things as adults. But we didn't. So we have to deal with life without the confidence to face adversity that others have.
So we deal with THAT as adults and it's okay.
Love your therapist, miss your therapist and deepen your attachement to them. For me, it formed the basis for the confidence that I was lacking.
Yes, you are trying to recreate something that you missed as a child, but it is SUCH A NECESSARY thing for humans, that you need it in your life.
Take care of yourself and know that you will be sad a lot. But that sadness isn't a bad thing.
Cry, let it all out and then you will begin to live again.The light at the end of tunnel is in sight.
Maddie
poster:madeline
thread:705101
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061109/msgs/705244.html