Posted by gardenergirl on May 13, 2004, at 13:56:46
In reply to Re: Feeling crappy. Going to call T, a first for me, posted by DaisyM on May 13, 2004, at 1:24:33
> GG,
>
> I just got back tonight but I wanted to lend my support, both for calling and just in general. Any kind of feedback is so hard to hear when you already know or suspect it is an area of weakness for you. You have to ask yourself if it is something you *can* change, *want* to change or *can't* change. I believe there are differences in how males and females evaluate people, especially intimidation factors. If you were a guy, I bet your weakness would be a strength, i.e. decision maker or something.
>
> I must say, it is great to be able to tell someone else to use their Therapist to lean on. He'll be glad you called.
>Daisy,
I hope your retreat went well. You planned through so much, I bet it was great. Thanks for your warm thoughts. I have to admit, I did think about the gender and personal dynamics involved. This is the same boss I got into with about the office drama. So we have a bit of a volatile relationship at times. My T often refers to one unconscious speaking to another when talking about interpersonal stuff. I think our unconscious's have bonded in a way, and perhaps this contributes to occasional blurring of roles. I think he is a lot like me, at times, but perhaps because he is a man, he needs to be the one "up" versus one "down".So there was a part of me that wanted to view his feedback as coming as much from his own issues as mine...like maybe HE was intimidated rather than other students. But I don't know.
I do want to change this, but it feels like a lose-lose situation whatever I do. And thus, the core conflict. My T is helping me to feel more at ease with the conflict versus trying to solve it, per se. Because (and he also can relate personally to it) there really doesn't seem to be a behavioral answer to it that would be satisfying.
I'm really glad I called my T. I doubt I would have even considered it if it weren't for Babble. Y'all help me to realize that my needs are important, and that my T is there for me to rely on at times in order to take care of myself. This is definitely a sign of growth on my part. I feel really needy, but I am tolerating that feeling rather than fighting against it or denying it.
Take care and glad you are back!
gg
poster:gardenergirl
thread:346021
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040512/msgs/346489.html