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Posted by antigua on February 17, 2004, at 18:18:06

In reply to Such sad stories... (long), posted by DaisyM on February 17, 2004, at 17:58:05

Interesting you would bring that up as I was discussing that today.

My husband only knows a fraction of what I'm going through, mostly because I want to protect him from the horror of the truth of it. Well, I guess I protect myself. My husband goes ballastic when I discuss this w/him--he is so angry at my father, he hates him w/a passion. It's almost not worth discussing it because he ends up taking out his anger on the kids, or me, in one way or another--he feels badly for me and he can't do anything about it. He can't FIX it.

Today my T told me that maybe I'm letting my husband carry my anger for me. He is so angry that I don't have to deal w/it. I think she's right and I never really considered it. She said, what if you agree w/him when he starts talking bad about your father, what would he do? She asked if I could take that first step (since I can't seem to express my anger). I don't know if I can.

I know that I confuse my husband w/my father, and I have to remind myself that I can't punish him for the sins of my father. It's hard not to though. My husband is a good man, but to discuss the abuse just means I have to deal w/him on top of figuring out how I actually feel about it.




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