Posted by dove on October 21, 1999, at 16:02:05
In reply to Failure is a state of mind, janey girl...it's not , posted by janice on October 21, 1999, at 13:41:22
Jane - I understand exactly where you coming from, that mean streak the relatives like to dish out is absolute garbage for the soul. My father's side is just the same and my Mom is always getting scrutinized, up and down and their smug little grins. My Dad is so neurotic about his own weight, it's just a joke, almost.
Everyone has issues with weight, size, shape, symetricalness, lopsided heads, age-related wrinkles ect.. But, inside of these little bodies are people with dreams, thoughts, aspirations, failures and successes. Every person has a vulnerability and a strength, even if it remains hidden from themselves.
I have read a number of your posts and I appreciate your honesty but you must see that you are more than someone elses measuring rod. You are so much more than your hair, your shape, your voice or even your accomplishments. We all have worth not because of our strengths or weaknesses but because we are alive. Even the ants on the ground have someone somewhere that finds them interesting and worthy of attention.
You are not a failure as a human being. You may have failed at many goals, you may fail daily in your interactions with others. I have countless examples of failure, and what we do with this is the key to being well. We have to look beyond the details if that is what we're failing at. For me, I have to look at the details to see my success. I cannot let my failures be more important than my life or my person.
Honestly, I know there are many things I have blatantly failed at but they do not make me worth less than if I had succeeded at those very same things. In fact, it would probably make no differnce right now or in the future to me or anyone else if I had kept my house in perfection all the years of my life.
There are real mistakes with lasting consequences, those actions bringing death, disease or maybe a spell in the jailhouse. But even under those dire circumstances we can still do the right thing and we are still worth everything! You are worth so much more than what you perceive as failure. You were created a precious beautiful thing while you were in your mother's womb. Doesn't matter how you even got to your mother's womb, you have life and soul and you are existing in this world under the curse of insecure and short-sighted people's cruel judgements. They may reject you but you are not rejected, they may fail you but you are not a failure!
You are more than all your failures and forever you shall be! This is not a contest based on pluses and minuses, it is a walk that is judged on the ability to keep moving. Going backwards, okay. Going forwards, great. Crawling, yes that counts too. I see you and I recognize me in you and there are many here in the same situation. Gathering the brokenhearted, the overburdened, the lost and confused, the rejected, we're all here and we're all unique and precious and yet the same.
You are important, you are helping by sharing and giving by reading. We have so much and yet so little, our sight and vision needs to be stretched and realigned and we all need to put our dreams where our soles slap the ground.
dove
poster:dove
thread:13470
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19991016/msgs/13598.html