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Re: Ugly - Janeee!

Posted by Racer on October 21, 1999, at 15:40:12

In reply to Ugly, posted by Jane (janey girl) on October 21, 1999, at 13:10:04

I've got the same fat=ugly thing going on. I think most of us do, if we've grown up in Western European culture. Just remember what it is: RACISM!!!

So, if you look at a black person, do you see ugly? Asian? Hispanic? So, this anti-fat thing is the last acceptable form of racism. You wanna be racist?

Why is it racism? Because it's based on the body type of the dominant genetic group: WASPs. Why? Because being thin means being able to afford to eat the healthy, low fat foods that keep you thin, while indulging in other forms of gratification. Who's gonna buy and eat a doughnut if the alternative is an hour with the trainer, another with the masseuse, and then buy a nice Cartier watch?

In the real world, most of us can indulge ourselves by buying that doughnut. So, we don't stay stick thin unless we're anorexic or something. The idea of one body type being the only acceptable one is nothing more than a safe way to say, "hey, I'm better than you are." That's a nice safe hobby for the stringy haired, unbathed, fat, illiterate [fill in group of your choice here] of the world...

Janey, you are many things. You are hurting, you are sad, you are suffering, you are focussing on the negative, but you are not a failure. You are articulate, you care enough about yourself to find this place to vent some of your anguish, you have inspired caring in a number of people on this board, and you are trying to make yourself better. Guess what? You're likely to make yourself better by my standards than your family members who give you grief for your weight without bothering to note that you've lost 30#! Hell, I'm proud of you! The only way I could lose 30# would be to put duct tape over my mouth! (Hey, the duct tape diet book.... I'll make a million!)

Here's a trick for you Janey: when you find yourself falling into that place where you list every one of your failures, make yourself a list of every success you can think of. No matter how small, no matter how long ago, wrack your brain. Post that list where you can see it regularly. Read it daily. Make it pretty. Remind yourself of your successes. You've got them.

It may not mean much, but I've taken time to answer you today. I'm so overpressed for time I can't bear it, finding my way to the ladies room is going to be tough, and you've caused me to care enough about you that I've typed this long message in hopes of helping you feel better. That's an accomplishment.




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