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Re: Not such a good Memorial Day for me. SLS

Posted by jane d on May 26, 2009, at 1:22:03

In reply to Not such a good Memorial Day for me., posted by SLS on May 26, 2009, at 0:06:49

> I was depressed most of the day, had no one to be with, and nothing to do. No barbecues. Just raisin bran cereal. I was surprised by how situationally depressed I got about being biologically depressed. I realized how empty my life is, and how I have very few social contacts. I am not a participant in life and do very little to keep myself connected with the outside world. For some reason, these things hit me pretty hard today. It was a bit scary, because I didn't know where this kind of thinking would lead. I decided to call my ex-girlfriend whom I see as a friend occasionally. She invited me over for some dessert and coffee. It was good that I got out of the house. I don't feel too bad right now. I hope this depression recedes, as this state feels so foreign to me. I used to feel like this all of the time. I now realize just how successful I have been to be so positive and constructive regarding my predicament in life. For the most part, I have been successful at avoiding suicidal depressions. I am usually very grateful for all of the gifts I have been given. I am usually optimistic about my future. I am usually tolerant of being alone. For some reason, these things disappeared. I know this is only temporary, but it has been very upsetting to me.
> - Scott

Some of the hardest days I think come after you start to feel better. Perhaps we become resensitized to the bad feelings. And it is scary if you start to contemplate how bad things can get. I wanted to respond to your post but I've been having trouble figuring out just how. Congratulations on your eloquence doesn't seem quite right when what you are being eloquent about is unhappiness. Cheerily pointing out that you WERE constructive even today in your actions also doesn't seem right. Besides I'm sure you know that. I guess the best I can do is tell you I recognized the feelings, and the day, you described. I hear you?





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