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Re: I want to die *trigger* » Fivefires

Posted by Kath on February 22, 2008, at 21:51:20

In reply to Re: I want to die *trigger*, posted by Fivefires on February 22, 2008, at 20:47:46

> These women came over and will get back in touch w/ me Mon. They mentioned the prior re: weekends as well.

******What women FF? I'm glad you have someone involved with you.****

> This is strange L.
>
> I must have *accidentally deleted posts after ClearSkies and b4 yours*. Sorry all.

*******FF - I don't know what you mean. I didn't think we could delete posts.***

>
> No L. Never had anyone to really 'process these memories with'. All Ts want me to push it back, away, and replace it w/ thoughts, mantras, or skills, and I don't think it works or has worked for me. I had 8mos of DBT. Suppose CBT similar.

****I've had this problem also with more than one T. I became a patient of the head of psychiatry at the local hospital & he pretty-well said, 'well, that's all in the past; we don't want to dwell on that' etc. Finally, I've found
a doctor who offers group therapy. She explained that while she doesn't suggest dwelling on events of the past, she thinks it's healthy to look at an event & look at how it might be affecting us NOW. To me, that makes total sense. Also a trama-free way of dealing with PAST trauma is the TAT hold. As far as I know there's a little video of a helicopter pilot telling how TAT helped him easily release the traumatic feelings of a helicopter crash he was in, where he was trapped & was sure he was going to die. The link for that (I believe) is www.tatlife.com ****

> As moving, will be getting new therapist.
>
> Wonder if I could find one that would treat me 'the old-fashioned way'; let me get it out. Society doesn't let me; fam' doesn't let me. I believe this kind of therapy has a name or names.(?) Maybe Gestalt, but that's just a guess.

*****see above mention of link. ******

>
> I could cry an ocean. There's so much feeling bad in me that I can barely breathe sometimes. If can't get it out, I'll become a bitter and angry person, or, maybe that is me now.(?)

******I've found this helps me sometimes. I'm right-handed. So with my left hand, & colourful markers, I let my 'inner child' draw stuff that she likes. Often it's butterflies. Lately it's her being hugged by angels! Whatever 'she' wants to draw, she draws! I usually feel amazingly lighter after.********

> Do you or any1 think this may be just what I need, and can any1 give me the proper term for this kind of therapy?

****I don't know what it's called. I think we all need to 'tell our story'. I would urge you, when you have the energy to find a women's shelter. I bet they would be able to suggest some resources for you. I think you need to tell your abuse story in a safe place. SAFE, being the operational word. I suspect an abused-women's shelter might even have groups you could attend. It'd be worth a try. If you don't know where one is, a phonecall to the hospital or police station might help.*****
> I missed my doc appt this a.m. (pcp) as having horrible stomach/digestion probs probably from the stress. I told my daughter how I was feeling and I'm sure she'll call again tonight, tho' has plenty to deal w/ herself.

****Hope she's able to call you FF.****


> I was online earlier responding to some fam' emails and didn't see any posts; thought maybe I'd erred in responding to ClearSkies.
>
> I'm sure it was prob' me doing something wrong.

*****Not sure what you mean by the above, but as I said before, it's not that busy here, so don't take it personally if there aren't replies FF.***

>
> Last eve' b4 logged off I spilled an entire can of pepsi in and on my desk; all supplies. Cleaned out the two drawers and everything in them. Now for the carpet. I guess I was lucky not to have hit the keyboard, printer, or pute, awa my cell phone which was sitting right here.

*****Glad it didn't hit your keyboard!!! Sounds like an overwhelming thing to happen****


******Don't worry about answering everyone. And as to the 3-post rule....it's my understand that that means we can't start more than 3 'threads' IN A ROW. I understand that we can reply to more than 3 posts within a thread. I hope I understood this correctly when I asked Deputy Dinah about it recently.

You're in my thoughts, FF, hugs, Kath

 

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