Posted by corafree on October 10, 2006, at 16:46:05
In reply to How about a mental exercise? » Rjlockhart, posted by Racer on October 9, 2006, at 19:29:12
Racer said
<The best you can do is change your reactions to her, and that's something you can do.>
This is very good advice, I think; but yes, it could be difficult, so maybe make it a goal to work on and to discuss w/ a therapist as what U want to get out of therapy.
This could be 'the change' UR looking for.
Remember you can 'not react', but 'act' in dealing w/ your mother. If U are 'lost for words', go to your private space in the home and put in some ear plugs and do whatever U need to do 'not to react'. I know it's very hard to change our 'dance w/ a toxic partner', especially when we care for them, but 4 your sake, (and actually hers as well) stop the dance. Make it your goal and elicit the assistance of your P, therapist, friend, us.
I am 'stuck in fear' in my life right now, literally 'stuck', and fearful about not moving forward. I get uncomfortable if I don't feeling 'I'm exceling or out there making a difference'.
I just read something about fear.
It can be a good thing. It inspires us to look at our life and opportunities, and it doesn't necessarily mean 'Oh no! Things are bad! I've gotta' do something about it right now!'
It can also inspire us to take a look at what we 'do have' and make the choice to choose 'it'.
I'm sorry you are feeling so confused and it's so uncomfortable. I hope you find 'some peace' this day.
cf
poster:corafree
thread:691924
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20061005/msgs/693615.html