Posted by Dinah on October 16, 2004, at 16:12:46
In reply to (((Dinah))) picture your son looking lovingly, posted by 64bowtie on October 16, 2004, at 15:10:08
D*mn it.
I found myself reassuring my son last night that everything would be ok no matter what happened, because Mom and Dad would be here to watch out for him.
And then I thought about my plans and felt a bit sick.
And then I was talking to my husband this morning about his Mom, and he told me how much he needed me. He's promised that he'll outlive me, but he wanted me to reassure him that it wouldn't be for many many years. And I felt a bit sick again.
It's so much easier to be selfish and only think about how much I hurt. And how I can't bear to hurt like this.
It's a lot harder to look in the faces of people who are also hurting, and know I could hurt them more.
Which still leaves me caught in the headlights.
poster:Dinah
thread:400979
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20041016/msgs/403883.html