Posted by Angel Girl on June 16, 2004, at 9:29:24
In reply to Re: Letting go, posted by Emme on June 15, 2004, at 16:46:54
Emme
I understand what you're saying about her still being human and maybe she is struggling with what she perseves to be the right thing. BUT, why tell me you have forgiven me and forgotten the incident and then change your mind. She would've been better to have not said anything to me at all.
I'm the type of person that when there is a conflict between myself and somebody else, I like to talk it out and resolve it. I HATE it when the other person just wants to drop the issue and not talk about it anymore. Ok, maybe that brings closure for them but what about me, it sure doesn't bring any kind of closure for me and then I sit and stew about it and try to figure out what I did wrong. Why can't people just learn to communicate instead of ignoring it. Ignoring it doesn't make it go away. It just buries it.
Oh oh!!! You brought up the 'control' word. lol!!! That's another problem for me. I really come unglued when I don't have control over something that affects me. I hate to lose control to someone else.
Maybe my need to have everybody like me is because IRL I have NO friends whatsoever. My only friends are on the net and the numbers are dwindling at a rapid rate. I've come to the conclusion that I can't form anymore close attachments to people. I must keep them at arms length or else there is going to be problems. I can't seem to manage relationships so I've decided that if I keep everybody at a safe distance from now on, then maybe there'll be less strife in my life. Of course, OTOH, it leaves me with no friends too, therefore also with deeper depression. What to do?
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And depression and anxiety make it worse - my feelings and thoughts get distorted. So mood control helps in normalizing relationhips.
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BINGO!!!! That's EXACTLY why I can't manage relationships. My thoughts are so distorted, I'm EXTREMELY sensitive, I analyze everything to death I misinterpret what is being said to me and I'm paranoid that everyone is going to leave me, which they all seem to do.
How have you learned to control your mood? I certainly need to do that.
I have been in the process of finding a new therapist but I've gotten side-tracked because I'm going through withdrawal from a med I had to stop. Not doing too well physically right now. In fact, I'm barely even functioning at this point. Hopefully this will come to an end soon so I can get back into finding a therapist who can hopefully help me with everything.
Thanks.
AG
poster:Angel Girl
thread:356809
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040611/msgs/357185.html