Posted by Emme on June 15, 2004, at 16:46:54
In reply to Letting go, posted by Angel Girl on June 15, 2004, at 4:48:30
Just because she knows Forgive-and-Forget is the "Christian" thing to do and she is aspiring to be a good Christian doesn't mean she's necessarily finding it easy to do. She may be sweet and kind but she's also human. She's probably stuggling with it.
I understand the part about it driving you crazy. I tend to go absolutely nuts until a conflict with a friend is resolved. In this case you've done what you can by apologizing. Give her a little space and perhaps she'll be past it in a while.
It sounds like you've got a pretty good understanding of what's going on with your needing to have everyone like you and trying too hard. Sounds all too familiar to me. It's hard to do, but caring less is better when a situation is beyond your control. I don't know if this is any comfort to you, but the "gotta have everyone like me" problem has faded a little for me as I've gotten older.
Maybe time just mellows you out. Maybe it's in part a confidence thing. I'm no longer the bookish kid who was teased on the playground. I have enough long-term friendships. So... I feel like I'm socially acceptable and I find that I don't try overly hard with people anymore in terms of general socializing. Does that make any sense?
And depression and anxiety make it worse - my feelings and thoughts get distorted. So mood control helps in normalizing relationhips.
Feel better!
Emme
poster:Emme
thread:356809
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040611/msgs/356991.html