Posted by kara lynne on November 29, 2003, at 18:05:32
I'm trying to replace I want to die with I want love.
I babysat an intoxicated friend last night and didn't get much sleep. I didn't do anything today except watch television. I kept lying there thinking, I'm not doing anything, I'm not doing anything, I'm not doing anything...I should be doing something.
There is so much traffic out this weekend that I didn't want to face it, to do any number of things I need to do to start a life.
I guess it's really finally over. The ex has stopped leaving messages that I don't answer. I'm trying to think of strong women I would want to emulate...who wouldn't call men who treated them poorly. But then you read that Katherine Hepburn put up with all sorts or tirades from Spencer Tracy, and chalked it up to his quirky charm and their exalted love.
I have to be someone I respect first. I want to go back to the relative safety of a bad relationship rather than learning to respect myself.
I woke up to the sound of my neighbors having sex at 4am.
Why is it so hard to take the first steps?
poster:kara lynne
thread:285069
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031124/msgs/285069.html