Posted by Racer on September 10, 2001, at 6:02:46
In reply to Re: (...) all that..from a young'un...Racer, posted by sar on September 10, 2001, at 1:27:20
> i'm curious in seeing this old flame of mine. how would that make you feel?
Actually, my SO knows all about the OL thing. Not the part about OL being the most physically overwhelming man I've ever encountered, but the part about being in touch and getting together. Just wanting to set that part straight! I'm not 'cheating', in the sense that I wouldn't keep something like this from my SO.
And someone said something about my feelings about my SO being in touch with an OL of his own: he is! His longest SO before me is still a friend of his, someone I know he cares about deeply, and I encourage that. My SO is also friends with my last SO, and actually *begged* him to come to my mother's for Christmas last year! We both think that the friendships we've made in earlier years are valuable, and that if the other can maintain a friendship with an OL, that's all to the good. After all, if the ex is the devil incarnate, what were we doing with that person to begin with??? At least, that's the way it's been for us.
So, the big issues for me are just all the memories, I guess, and the desire to be the girl I was when I was with this fellow. That, and to experience that overwhelming bliss of this OL making love to me. Mind you, I know that it wouldn't be the same. I know that there are only disappointments in that sort of thing. I also know that my SO would be hurt, and I would never want to hurt him.
Hell, I don't know. I do know that I will not do anything as stupid as going to bed with this guy. I do know that I'm in love with my SO, and that we can overcome his hangups -- if he is willing. I also know that the lack of sex is a make or break for me. If he's not willing to work on it, well, that's a deal breaker. I think he'll work on it, but I'll have to make clear that it's a "do it now, or regret it later" sort of thing.
Thanks, everyone, for your thoughts and support.
poster:Racer
thread:11024
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010909/msgs/11078.html