Posted by Noa on January 16, 2001, at 15:30:09
In reply to Re: Help my heart is broken, posted by Gena on January 16, 2001, at 14:49:27
In defense of Lexie, I believe she did tell us that her own pdoc had told her that he would have to reveal all, and would be compelled to come down on the husband's side on this, and Lexie wasn't able to find anyone to support her desire to maintain custody, so in the interest of avoiding a bitter custody battle (her husband seems to have set it up as all or nothing), which she feels would be traumatic for her son, she chose not to fight it at this point.
I know people who have taken the other route, and only to lose in the end, but with the further harm of putting the child through the bitterest most polarizing battle. I think the system we use is not the best for the child or the family, but it is what is, and Lexie, like many parents in her shoes, had to choose what she felt was best for her son, given the limitations of the system.
I am bothered by at least one assumption implicit in your post---that Lexie did not try to prevent this from happening. It bothers me for two reasons---first, you admit to not being familiar with her situation, so to assume this is rather a leap, and second, to me, your post has an accusing sort of tone, which is the last thing Lexie needs right now, as someone who is struggling with so much.
I know that sometimes this text-based communication skews how things come across, so, I will stay openminded about your intentions.
poster:Noa
thread:3916
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010105/msgs/3982.html