Posted by shar on September 25, 2000, at 21:37:46
In reply to Screaming misery and frustration, posted by Racer on September 25, 2000, at 4:29:12
Well, Racer, DAMN them for being such back-stabbing obviously threatened, uncivilized a-holes to you! And, SCREW them for embarrassing you even for one second.You get down here to Austin. This is high tech land (they call it Silicon Hills, which I hate because I love Austin so). Also, State capitol, also U of Tx here. You will have no problem getting a job.
Nobody has the right to treat you that way, ever, and I get PISSED OFF just thinking about it. You deserve billions times better than that. It is ironic but non-profits (some) can be really screwed up places in my experience.
Well, I'm just mad all over about their treatment of you and I hope to hell you won't take one iota of it personally, because you are head and shoulders above them when it comes to poise and grace and equanimity.
I can hook you up to a tech women's BB here in Austin if you are interested. And feeling like a "failure" is not unusual, but also not true. It is very rejecting, what happened, and I think the best thing is to try to get some distance on it (like, what if a friend of yours had written that post?). They don't even know you, so it can't be personal!
Love yourself, ignore the bozoheads.
Shar
> OK, here's the sitch:
>
> I moved to Silicon Valley. I got a job. It was the dream job for me: administering a non-profit computer training center. Basically, the same things I did in the cowtown of old.
>
> So, why am I quitting? Let's see: I've let them walk all over me. My first paycheck was four weeks late, and no one seems to care. I know that the problems really aren't my problems. I know that I nagged for more than four weeks to get paid. I know that I called and emailed the person I had to go through daily for two of those weeks, with no response whatsoever. I know that NOTHING was done, despite my nagging. I know that when the check was finally made out, by someone else all together, spur of hte moment, because I had finally called EVERYONE on the board of directors until some one got a check written, and that person told me that I SHOULD have gone to so and so to get the check, Well, I know that that's not something which happened because *I'M* so screwed up.
>
> In the last six weeks, I have been insulted, disregarded, micromanaged -- without receiving any support at all -- and blindsided in front of outsiders so that I feel like an idiot.
>
> So, why do I feel like a failure? Despite the drugs, I'm getting depressed about this. I feel like a fat, sloppy, useless, lumpy, idiotic, worthless lump of flesh.
>
> What now? Anyone have anything to offer? (Beyond what I already know: I may be allowing it to happen, but I certainly don't have the power to make them as truly screwy as they are! I guess what I want is to find out if anyone has any idea what causes this cycle of self-defeating thinking, and how to break out of the rut.)
>
> Oh, and anyone have a job to offer me? I'd prefer one where the paychecks came in when they're supposed to. I dunno, I'm just a little anal-retentive that way...
>
>
> (PS: does 'anal-retentive' have a hyphen in it?)
poster:shar
thread:675
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20000813/msgs/685.html