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Re: Dilemma in Therapy

Posted by emmanuel98 on April 2, 2010, at 20:42:09

In reply to Re: Dilemma in Therapy, posted by widget on April 2, 2010, at 18:22:38

What is wrong with a therapist telling a patient that they have romantic feelings toward him/her is that it destroys the "as if" nature of therapy. Therapy is a place where you explore your feelings and what they mean to you. Not where you explore the therapist's feelings. My therapist was always willing to say that he liked me, cared about me, wanted me to get well, appreciated how hard I worked, but he would never tell me that he had fantasies about me. If he had that would have destroyed the safety of therapy. Suddenly the therapy becomes about your mutual feelings for one another and not about you.

My therapist had nothing but contempt for therapists who couldn't adhere to this simple boundary. I understand it also because I am a teacher. Occasionally I found a student particularly attractive, but I didn't express this or talk about this because it would change the nature of the relationship and make the relationship unsafe for the student.


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poster:emmanuel98 thread:941668
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20100303/msgs/941909.html