Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) » frida

Posted by LadyBug on July 4, 2008, at 11:44:04

In reply to Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o), posted by frida on July 4, 2008, at 7:51:39

Frida,
I want to think she cares and that she is respecting my choice. I know that's how it works in therapy. If I make a decision to leave, she needs to respect it no matter what she is feeling is the right thing.
Today has been a particularly hard day for me so far. Here it is the 4th of July and I'm home alone. I don't mind my alone time, I actually enjoy the freedom to do as I please. It's a time for me to think about my life uninterrupted by other's demands. Both of my girls have plans with their boyfriends/friends later today. My oldest daughter invited me to go with her, her boyfriend, and their friends to go to dinner and a movie then some fireworks. Part of me just wants to stay home to be alone. (the depressed side)

Every night this week as I'm going to sleep, I read over and over the 3 page letter I sent to my T. I try to see my point of view and try to figure out how she took it.

I won't totally discount the idea of seeing her in a few months. I can think about it. My fear is rejection and more hurt. I can't handle anymore for now.

Thank you for your support. It means so much to me right now. I feel like this is the one and only place I have to share as in no one in my real life has a clue how I feel or what my T did to me. The APRN I see for my medication knows my T. She knows some of what happened but I don't know her well enough to really talk about it. I've seen her about 4 times is all.

I'm trying to decide if I want to go hang out at our pool for a few hours. I have a headache, maybe the sun will take it away and also give me some time to think about my wonderful life. (joke)
I do like my job I started a few months ago. I know I've been blessed with it and the timing couldn't have come at a better time. My supervisor has been the best. Positive, funny, kind, nothing but good to me and for me.

I miss sharing my life with my T. I miss her like crazy yet part of me hates her for what she did.
LadyBug

Thread

Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) LadyBug 7/2/08
...
Re: I'll answer that for ya Dinah, raisin, phillip LadyBug 7/2/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) sassyfrancesca 7/2/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) » sassyfrancesca LadyBug 7/2/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) lucie lu 7/2/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) » LadyBug Happyflower 7/2/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) Daisym 7/2/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) » lucie lu LadyBug 7/2/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) » Happyflower LadyBug 7/2/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) » Daisym LadyBug 7/2/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) » LadyBug Dinah 7/3/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) » Dinah LadyBug 7/3/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) frida 7/4/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) » frida LadyBug 7/4/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o)LB rskontos 7/4/08
Re: Happyflower, I'll answer that for ya ;o) » rskontos LadyBug 7/5/08
Re: you are most welcome:) (nm) » LadyBug rskontos 7/5/08

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poster:LadyBug thread:837641
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080616/msgs/837989.html