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Re: A New Understanding (long) rskontos

Posted by B2chica on May 9, 2008, at 14:22:24

In reply to A New Understanding (long), posted by rskontos on May 8, 2008, at 11:54:54

rk, its like hearing fingernails on a chalkboard when i hear you continually say you have to keep "trying" with this therapist.
it seems you are putting more effort into this relationship than he is. that is NOT the way it is supposed to be.

i would continue seeing him (as a support base) and start looking/interviewing new therapists.
first make lots and lots of phone calls.
make a list of ....ok i'm saying this backwords....
start over,
First, make a list of questions for phone, ask initial questions (primary questions), do they have experience with DID, how long in practice, what is their approach, how long are their sessions...etc.
then from there mark on the paper the ones you want to call back, make a list of secondary questions for a face to face interview. ask everything from where did they go to school to, how available are they for emergencies. also find out, their beliefs in medication, and if they will communicate with your pdoc (if you have one)...etc all these kind of things.
if you need more suggestions for questions, just come here my dear. there are enough of us to spout out questions, you'll have enough to fill up that 50 min in no time.

and about starting over....well i thought that i would NEVER do it after my last T.
but something happened. it was worse but also better this time around.
my "parts" became more free to tell. and actually i felt better after telling. i didn't dissociate nearly as much after telling an 'episode' of abuse. before i would have been wiped out the whole night. now (maybe out of necessity) i am just out of it for a few hours...except those really bad sessions.

and quite frankly i think your gut has been trying to tell you this for a while. and i think you are spending SO much time worrying about whether or not this T is right for you that you are making anxiety worse for yourself, and possibly even hindering your progression. Also, if you question it that much, it's easy. it's not right. nothing wrong, not bad. i'm sure he's a really nice guy and good therapist. he's just not right (at this time) for you. maybe if you were in a different place, well maybe he'd be right. but i feel you are needing Much more.
You are needing to be taken care of. and i don't feel you are getting that from him.
you are not getting 100% from him, and dear one you deserve NOTHING LESS.





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