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Re: Mooning over my therapist... » backseatdriver

Posted by widget on May 7, 2008, at 12:11:29

In reply to Mooning over my therapist..., posted by backseatdriver on May 6, 2008, at 19:44:29

I understand. It took me 3 years to trust my therapist and that turned quickly to romantic love. So much of what has been written here applies to my situation, ie: similar backgrounds, political views, likes and dislikes in general. When I first began with him, I was relieved that I would not have to worry about "tranference" as he was not at all appealing to me and was even annoying. Nobody could have been more surprised than I that I developed such strong romantic and sexual feelings for him. It is almost 2 years since that happened. We have discussed it a lot. Bottom line: he has strict boundaries. I tried every way I could to argue my case but it was like hitting my head against a brick wall. I became angry with him and determined to not have "those feelings" but they still appear, often at the most unexpected times. My bond with him is unlike ANYTHING I have ever experienced. My best advice is to talk to him about it. It takes what it takes. I have, unwillingly(!) accepted that nothing romantically nor sexually will happen. I still love him so much. So, half of the dilemna is solved. I relate to what you said about not feeling this way since I was a teenager; what a shock! And, I, too, know this is more than "transference". But, if he is more comfortable calling it that, so be it. He, also, pointed out to me that when sex enters the relationship, therapy stops. I can really see that. You aren't alone, not at all. It helped me to read your story. Thanks, Widget


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