Posted by ElaineM on November 6, 2006, at 20:30:09
In reply to Re: body and head stuff » ElaineM, posted by sunnydays on November 6, 2006, at 7:35:20
Thanks Sunny (all you guys). I appreciate your support. My worst fear is that when something finally does happen to me no one will even notice. No one except him. But other then that, I could live in a hospital bed and there wouldn't be a single ripple in the rest of the world. I guess that's what happens when you live your life alone - I feel like I wrapped myself in an eating disorder and a few other of the main diagnosis, delaying life and contact with the world. And now, when the strongest of those crutches is gone (and the liability of the others are magnified) I'm left with a gaping hole when I need help the most. I'm so down on myself lately, and really judgemental about my part in creating all this mental illness. I'm usually kinder to myself. But it's easy to be that way when things are going alright-ish. Impossible now.
Sunny I didn't (or haven't yet) called the person for the wait-list. I'd forgotten about it this weekend. Plus, it could take a few months. I've never really been great at believing that a future that far away will exist for me. I'll think about it more when I get better.
thanks for thinking of me.
blove EL
poster:ElaineM
thread:699952
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061026/msgs/701068.html